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Atonement: The John Paulk Story

Atonement: The John Paulk Story

John was an ex-gay, ex-drag queen and an evangelical Christian. He married an ex-lesbian, had three children and became the poster boy for “conversion therapy” for over 15 years, traveling across the world to preach the idea you can ‘pray away the gay’.

 

John Paulk was living proof that they could change, that God would love them, and that they could live a “normal” heterosexual life. ?

 

But John was living a lie: he was still gay. ?

 

Now, he’s ready to tell his story.

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iheart.com/podcast/1119-atonement-the-john-paulk-315724613

Episodes

2. There?s No Place Like Home

John makes his way to the residential program that will shape his life forever.

There, he meets John Smid, the former director of Love in Action. And the woman who would become his wife.



Atonement: The John Paulk Story is a production of iHeart Podcasts and Goldhawk Productions in association with Marks Media Co.

If you’ve been affected by any of the issues covered in this series, you can find help and support at the following links:

988 Suicide & Crisis Lifeline

The Lifeline provides 24/7, free and confidential support for people in distress. Call or text 988 or chat online.

Crisis Text Line

If you are in crisis, text CONVO to 741741 in the US for free, confidential, 24/7, support.

The Trevor Project

The leading suicide prevention and crisis intervention organization for LGBTQ+ young people. If you or someone you know needs help or support, The Trevor Project’s trained crisis counselors are available 24/7 at 1-866-488-7386, via the website or by texting START to 678678.

RAINN

RAINN - the Rape, Abuse & Incest National Network - provide free, confidential, 24/7 help. Call 1-800-656-4673 or the website to chat with a support specialist.

If you’re in the UK, please find a range of helplines and support networks here.

See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

2026-01-20
Link to episode

1. The Dancefloor

John steps back into the story he once tried to outrun.

Alongside expert insights and survivors of “Conversion Therapy”, John begins peeling back the layers of how he became one of the most totemic figures of the ex-gay movement.

Atonement: The John Paulk Story is a production of iHeart Podcasts and Goldhawk Productions in association with Marks Media Co.



If you’ve been affected by any of the issues covered in this series, you can find help and support at the following links:

988 Suicide & Crisis Lifeline

The Lifeline provides 24/7, free and confidential support for people in distress. Call or text 988 or chat online.

Crisis Text Line

If you are in crisis, text CONVO to 741741 in the US for free, confidential, 24/7, support.

The Trevor Project

The leading suicide prevention and crisis intervention organization for LGBTQ+ young people. If you or someone you know needs help or support, The Trevor Project’s trained crisis counselors are available 24/7 at 1-866-488-7386, via the website or by texting START to 678678.

RAINN

RAINN - the Rape, Abuse & Incest National Network - provide free, confidential, 24/7 help. Call 1-800-656-4673 or the website to chat with a support specialist.

If you’re in the UK, please find a range of helplines and support networks here.

See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

2026-01-13
Link to episode

Introducing: Atonement: The John Paulk Story

See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

2026-01-06
Link to episode
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