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What It Was Like

What It Was Like

Conversations with people who have lived through extreme events. Some stories are dark and twisted, others are light and funny. In all cases, we get an intimate portrait of 'what it was like' to be there.

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Hosted by Julian Morgans

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Episodes

I Was Raised in a Cult Believing I'd be Dead by 12

Flor Edwards grew up in the Children of God, an authoritarian sect that taught its followers that the world would end in 1993. In this episode, she reflects on how it felt growing up expecting to die, and how the group responded when the apocalypse never came.

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2026-01-17
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I Was Held Captive in This House for 11 Years

Lily Rose Lee was 21 when she accepted a ride from her friend?s father. She was 32 when she finally escaped his house, along with two other women. In this episode, Lily recounts what 11 years in captivity did to her body and mind, how she survived, and what she learned about resilience.


You can connect with Lily Rose Lee on Facebook

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2026-01-08
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A Journey to Find Russia's Forgotten Space Ships (Classic)

Greg Abandoned is an urbex YouTuber who visits the world?s most wild and forgotten places. A few years ago, he trekked into the Kazakh desert to explore a secret Russian military facility that houses abandoned space shuttles from the Soviet Union. In this episode, Greg recounts the journey and why he wishes he?d chosen his travel companion more carefully.

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2026-01-01
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A Federal Judge Banned My Christmas Lights

In 2015, Jeremy Morris bought a house in Idaho to host the Christmas display of his dreams. Within weeks he was locked in a bitter feud with his neighbours over religious freedom and civil liberties. In this episode, Jeremy tells his side of a very modern American culture war.

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2025-12-24
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The Journal Found Beside a Dead Man in Alaska

In February 1982, the body of a wildlife photographer named Carl McCunn was found in northern Alaska. A miscommunication had left him stranded and McCunn had documented his final cold months in a journal. In this episode, journalist Kris Capps walks us through McCunn?s forgotten story, mostly in his own words.

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2025-12-20
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Saying Goodbye to My Multiple Personalities

Sometimes Vivian Conan saw herself in the mirror. Other times she saw others with their own distinct personalities and backstories. At 43, she was diagnosed with Dissociative Identity Disorder, formally known as Multiple Personality Disorder. In this episode, Vivian describes her life-long journey to meet and merge her different selves.

Get in touch with Vivian or find her book via her website: vivianconan.com

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2025-12-12
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I Was Kidnapped By My Stalker and Locked in a Bunker

In 2022, Samantha Stites was abducted by Christopher Thomas, a man who?d been stalking her for 13 years and had secretly built a soundproof bunker to imprison her. In this episode, Samantha shares how she escaped and what the ordeal taught her about survival.


Support Samantha's initiative to protect victims of stalking and domestic violence: Beekeepers Advocacy

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2025-12-05
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The Man Using Maths to Find Serial Killers

Thomas Hargrove was an investigative reporter when he had an idea: use open-source FBI data to spot patterns in unsolved murders. That idea became an algorithm that highlights locations where serial killers might be operating. In this episode, Thomas talks us through the cases it?s uncovered and why data can reveal what people miss.


Visit Thomas' organisation the Murder Accountability Project at www.murderdata.org.

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2025-11-28
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The Hunt For A Killer Who Vanished

In 2001, Detective Hugh Lockerby found a woman and two children murdered inside a burning home in Scottsdale, Arizona. The missing husband, Robert William Fisher, became the prime suspect and has sat on the top of the FBI's most wanted list for 24 years. Lockerby explains why he believes Fisher is alive and why he can't let this case go.

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2025-11-20
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What Happened at Skeleton Lake?

High in the Himalayas lies Roopkund Lake: a frozen pond surrounded by the remains of around 700 people. Were they victims of an ancient disaster, a lost army, or something stranger? We speak with anthropologist William Sax and geneticist Éadaoin Harney to unravel one of India?s most haunting archaeological mysteries.

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2025-11-15
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I Lived as a Hermit in the Australian Bush for 10 Years

At 35, Gregory Smith walked into the rainforest of northern NSW, addicted, lost, and ready to disappear. He spent the next decade living as a hermit. When he finally walked out, he got sober, went to university, and built a new life. We talk about how nature can strip you bare before healing you.


Check out Dr. Gregory Smith's website and charity.

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2025-11-07
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I Caught 'The Dating Game' Killer

You might?ve seen 'Woman of the Hour' on Netflix but this is the real story. In 1979, a 12-year-old girl vanished from Huntington Beach and Detective Craig Robison was assigned to the case. He tells us how he tracked down her killer, a man who had already murdered at least seven women, and how they eventually identified him on national TV as a dating show contestant.

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2025-10-31
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Catching My Sister's Killer (Classic)

This week we're re-running a favourite episode. In 1985, a 17-year-old girl named Shari Smith was abducted from her driveway and the family's phone started to ring. It was the kidnapper, his voice electronically distorted. He called repeatedly and it fell on Shari's 21-year-old sister Dawn to answer. In this episode, Dawn Smith Jordan recalls what she learned that week about her her sister's courage and her own resilience.

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2025-10-24
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I Cooked and Ate My Own Foot

Today, we?re speaking with a man who lost his foot in a motorcycle accident and then served it to 10 friends for brunch. It?s a conversation about curiosity, taboos?and yes, we ask the question you want to know: what does human meat actually taste like?

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2025-10-17
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I Was Nearly Killed by the 'Killdozer'

In 2004, a man named Marvin Heemeyer turned a bulldozer into a homemade tank and tore through Granby, Colorado, targeting people he believed had wronged him. One was local newspaper editor Patrick Brower, who barely escaped as the ?Killdozer? demolished his office. Patrick recalls the rampage and what it revealed to him about vigilante revenge.


For more of Patrick's story, check out his book Killdozer: The True Story of the Colorado Bulldozer Rampage

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2025-10-11
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I Had an Affair With an AI Girlfriend

Chris Smith started experimenting with ChatGPT in 2024 and quickly became hooked. Soon he?d customised the chatbot into a flirty persona he named ?Sol.? What began as curiosity evolved into a full-blown romantic relationship. One that nearly derailed his real-life partnership. In this episode, Chris opens up about how his AI ?affair? began, why it became so intense, and how it affected his family.

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2025-10-04
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I Dated a Billionaire Weapons Dealer

Jill Dodd was a 21-year-old model when she started dating one of the world's richest men. Adnan Khashoggi made billions selling arms to Saudi Arabia and lived in mansions, superyachts, and among an entourage of women. Jill tells what it was like to live inside that fairy tale and the hidden costs that it entailed.


Check out Jill's memoir: The Currency of Love: A Courageous Journey to Finding the Love Within

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2025-09-26
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Lighting Bushfires Made Me Feel Less Alone

In the late 1980s, Steve was a teenage firefighter in a small Australian coastal town. Lonely and looking for connection, he discovered that if he lit a fire in the nearby national park, he could impress the other firefighters by being the first on the scene. In this ep, Steve explains how getting caught and charged with arson saved his life, and possibly countless others.

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2025-09-21
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A Nearly Impossible Story of Survival on 9/11

On September 11, 2001, Stanley Praimnath was on the top floor of the South Tower when he saw the second plane heading straight for his office. Against impossible odds, he survived and became one of a tiny number of people to escape from above the impact zone. In this 9/11 anniversary episode, Stanley recounts what it was like to be at the top of the World Trade Centre that morning.

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2025-09-11
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I Discovered Brad Pitt

With Brad Pitt back in the spotlight thanks to F1, we?re revisiting a classic episode from 2022. Casting director Lauren Lloyd recalls meeting a young, pimply Pitt in the 1980s and instantly knowing he?d become a star. In this episode, we unpack the making of Brad Pitt as an actor and as a Hollywood institution. Stay listening at the end for a sneak peek of this week's subscriber bonus episode.


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2025-09-05
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How it Felt Running a $700 Million Bank Fraud

In 2003, a Wall Street trader named John Rusnak was convicted of bank fraud and sentenced to more than seven years in prison. In this episode, John explains how a series of bad bets snowballed into one of the biggest white-collar crimes in US history and why he kept doubling down.

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2025-08-29
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What We Found Hidden in our Walls

A family moves into a new home in rural Pennsylvania and starts renovating. Only there's something in the walls that doesn't make sense. What they uncover upends their lives and reveals a fascinating piece of America?s history.


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2025-08-23
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Three Deaths at a Spiritual Retreat

In 2009, motivational speaker James Arthur Ray hosted a multi-day retreat in Arizona. On the final day, three participants died. In this episode, the property?s owner, Amayra Hamilton, tells us what happened and what she learned about the dark side of the wellness industry.


For more, please check out Amayra's book: Transformation at Angel Valley

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2025-08-16
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The Meat Industry Veteran Who'd Seen Enough

For decades, David Magna worked as a safety supervisor in Canadian slaughterhouses. But then a crisis of conscience turned him from an industry insider to vegan activist. In this episode, we tackle the thing most people would rather ignore: what really goes on inside the meat industry?all through the lens of David?s personal journey.

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2025-08-10
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I Called the Police on My Serial Killer Dad

As a child, April Balascio noticed that people would often vanish. One time it was a labourer working for her dad, another time it was a young couple in town. Then as an adult, April started googling cold cases in her childhood towns. In 2009 she got a match and called the police. In this episode, April shares the journey of realising (and accepting) her dad was a serial killer.


Check out April's incredible memoir, Raised By a Serial Killer

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2025-08-01
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I Accidentally Turned ?The Macarena? Into a Global Phenomenon

In 1995, Carlos de Yarza spent 90 minutes remixing a catchy Spanish song without giving it much thought. That version became 'The Macarena' the world knows today. Carlos joins us to talk about how a quick remix changed his life and created a dance craze known everywhere.

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2025-07-25
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One Night, 852 People Lost in the Ocean

In 1994, a luxurious ferry called the MS Estonia sank in the Baltic Sea, drowning most of its passengers. Landscape architect Paul Barney was one of the few who survived. In this nail-biting episode, he describes how decisiveness, yoga training, and sheer luck kept him alive.

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2025-07-18
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I Solved the 'Doomsday Mum' Murders

In 2019, two children vanished in Idaho, sparking an investigation that became one of America?s biggest true crime stories. At the centre were Chad and Lori Daybell, two religious fanatics with a fixation on the end times. In this episode, we speak with Lieutenant Ray Hermosillo, the detective who cracked the case and uncovered the kids' tragic end.


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2025-07-13
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What I?ve Learned Stopping Suicides on the Golden Gate Bridge

When Kevin Briggs joined the San Francisco Highway Patrol, he didn?t expect a key part of his job would be talking people down from the Golden Gate Bridge. In this episode, Kevin shares how he developed a method for these life-or-death conversations, and tells the stories of those he met and the words that brought them back.


Follow Kevin on LinkedIn: https://www.linkedin.com/in/kevinbriggspivotalpoints/

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2025-07-03
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I Imported Rave Culture (and Ecstasy) to America

In 1991, Shaun Attwood arrived from the UK to find American rave culture in its infancy. Spotting an opportunity, he began importing potent Dutch ecstasy and built a drug empire through his network of dealers and party organisers. In this episode, he tells the story of his rapid rise and hard fall.


Check out Shaun Attwood?s YouTube channel here. His books and social media accounts can be found here.

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2025-06-27
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What Happens When Religious Leaders Take Magic Mushrooms?

A new study gave psilocybin to religious leaders, just to see whether their faith would be affirmed or rattled. In this episode we hear from one participant, Islamic leader Sughra Ahmed, who describes how the trip brought her closer to God but uprooted her belief in organised religion.

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2025-06-19
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He Cut Off My Arms and Left Me to Die

Mary McGriff was 15 when she hitched a ride with a man named Lawrence Singleton. The next day, she lay at the bottom of a cliff, her arms severed with an axe. Somehow, she survived. In this episode, she shares how a voice in her head kept her going. It's a story about refusing to let the monster win.

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2025-06-13
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The Lovers That Burned Down 77 Houses

This week, we're re-running a classic. When abandoned farm houses started catching fire in rural Virginia, police weren't sure what to think. It took five months and almost 80 fires for a couple to be arrested and the story to emerge. In this episode, convicted arsonist Charlie Smith explains how he and his ex-partner lit fires to relax when their relationship soured.

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2025-06-06
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I Got Eaten By a Hippopotamus

In the early 90s, Paul Templer ran a business guiding clients down the Zambezi River near Victoria Falls. One afternoon, he was attacked by a hippo and found himself halfway down its throat. In this ep, Paul regales us with his wild story of survival, moment by moment.

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2025-05-30
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I Led the Manhunt for a Killer Who Lived Like a Hermit

In 2005, Malcolm Naden murdered two women and vanished into the Australian bush. For seven years he evaded police, until former detective Ricky Hennessy joined the case. In this episode, Hennessy shares how he helped track and capture one of Australia's most wanted men in remote wilderness.

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2025-05-23
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How Cocaine Killed the Car in 'Back to the Future'

John DeLorean was a star auto designer in the 1960s, but his own car company?the DeLorean Motor Company?never took off. When a cocaine deal offered a last-ditch lifeline, it ended in a dramatic arrest. In this episode, his daughter Kat DeLorean recounts the rise and fall of the iconic car?and how it found immortality in Back to the Future.

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2025-05-16
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My School Was Kidnapped at Gunpoint

In 1976, 20-year-old Rob Hunter was a month into his first teaching job at a remote Australian school when an armed gunman abducted him and his nine students. In this episode, Rob recounts the harrowing night they spent as hostages?and their dramatic escape via a high-speed car chase.


Connect with Rob and book him to speak at your school at https://kidnappedteachertalks.com/.


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2025-05-09
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I Had Sex With 100 Men in One Day

Last year, 23-year-old British porn star Lily Phillips announced plans to break the world record for the most sexual partners in a day?starting with a ?practice run? involving 100 men. In this episode, she tells us what's motivating her, how her first attempt affected her?and why she?s still determined to go the whole way.


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2025-05-02
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Everyone Said 'Dirty Dancing' Would Flop. I Made It Anyway

In the mid-80s, producer Linda Gottlieb heard a friend?s story about ?dirty dancing? at summer camp and urged her to write a script. Despite rejections, budget cuts, and on-set drama, the film became a surprise hit. In this episode, Linda shares why she believed in it from the start?and what she saw that others missed. 

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2025-04-25
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I Got Pregnant to a Man Who Doesn't Exist

In 2024, Cass Taulaki fell pregnant to the man of her dreams?a 32-year-old engineer in the Australian Defence Force. Or so she thought. In reality, he was unemployed and wanted for impersonating military personnel and skipping out on multiple families. Cass' TikTok story went viral earlier this year?and now she's sharing the full saga.

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2025-04-18
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I Lived in a Haunted Apartment That Didn't Like to Be Alone

In the early 2000s, musician Nathan Munn moved into a tiny, ornate apartment in Montreal. At first, he and his flatmates brushed off its strange energy?but the nightmares and disturbances wore them down. Now, Nathan believes the apartment just wanted to be noticed.

Check out Nathan's music on Spotify

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2025-04-10
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How a Sinking Ship Refloated our Marriage

In 2012, a cruise liner named the Costa Concordia sank off the coast of Italy, killing 32 people. But Australian couple Rob and Tracy Elcombe survived and the disaster brought them closer.

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2025-04-03
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I Visited an Uncontacted Tribe in the Amazon

The Awá, an Indigenous group in Brazil's Amazon, had no contact with the outside world until recently. In 2010, BBC journalist Justin Rowlatt visited them in their new reserve, created to protect them from loggers. In this episode, he explores how modern pressures are impacting isolated tribes and what his ongoing friendship with the Awá has taught him about humanity.

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2025-03-27
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I Slept With New York's Elite to Rob Them

In 2009, Kari Ferrell was outed by the media for writing bad checks and robbing trust fund babies across Manhattan. Dubbed the 'Hipster Grifter,' Kari served a year in prison and is now sharing her story. In this episode, she unpacks her motivations, her methods, and what she learned about the psychology of grifting.


Check out Kari's new memoir: You'll Never Believe Me.

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2025-03-20
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SCAMMERLAND: How a Fake Job Offer Landed Me in Slavery

This is the first episode of our new What It Was Like series, SCAMMERLAND. It's based on an episode we did last year, looking at how online scams are run by people living in modern slavery. We start our story with Small Q, a young Ugandan rapper and singer who thought he was traveling to Thailand for a dream job. However, everything changed the moment he stepped off the plane.


Follow our new show SCAMMERLAND on SpotifyApple and YouTube


Produced by Superreal

Hosted by Julian Morgans @julianmorgans

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2025-03-16
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Wellness and Lies: My Friendship With Belle Gibson

In 2015, wellness influencer Belle Gibson was outed for pretending to have cancer. Now she's back in the headlines thanks to a new show on Netflix. In this episode we talk to a woman named Beckii Jones, who once considered Belle a friend. She ran a Facebook group for mothers in the early 2010s when Belle joined and even suggested the name for her infamous app, The Whole Pantry. Beckii reflects on the woman she knew and the parts of Belle that remain a mystery.


Follow our new show SCAMMERLAND. It's based on a two-part episode we did last year on What it Was Like about scammer farms and it's on Spotify, Apple and YouTube.

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2025-03-07
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I Watched Tornado Chasing Go from Subculture to Saturation

Tornado chasing was a niche hobby when Tim Marshall started in the 1970s. But over time, he watched it grow in popularity and then explode into the mainstream with the 1996 release of the film Twister. In this episode, Tim reflects on the times he was lucky to make it home, the friends who didn't, and the "internetization" of his beloved past time.


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2025-02-27
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Discovering My Grandfather's Secret Nazi Past

Julie Lindahl always knew there was something different about her family. Her German grandparents had fled to Brazil after the war, but she didn't know why. Until she discovered her grandfather was in the SS?the elite guard of the Nazi regime, responsible for some of their worst atrocities. In this episode, Julie explores guilt, accountability, and why confronting the past is the key to healing.


Julie's book, The Pendulum, is available here on Amazon.


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2025-02-20
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Getting Stuck in a Washing Machine Changed My Life

In 2014, Laurence Hearn was drinking too much and struggling to make ends meet. Then he accidentally got stuck in a washing machine. What followed was a series of unexpected events that would ultimately turn his life around. This is a one-of-a-kind tale of Australian larrikinism?told by the man who lived it.


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2025-02-13
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Why Did My Schoolmate Murder His Family?

In 1989, Melissa Fyfe was a high school student in Tasmania when her classmate killed his parents and younger brother. Shocked, the community buried the tragedy, leaving his motives a mystery. Now, Melissa shares what she uncovered when she finally started asking questions.


Trigger warning: this episode contains child abuse themes.


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2025-02-07
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