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Feeding The Mouth That Bites You: Parenting Today's Teens

Feeding The Mouth That Bites You: Parenting Today's Teens

A weekly podcast on parenting teens and launching them into the world. Hosted by Jessica Pfeiffer with Dr. Ken Wilgus, author of the book "Feeding The Mouth That Bites You."

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Episodes

Episode 168: Neurodiversity And Teenagers

What is neurodiversity and what does it mean to be neurodivergent? Today we talk about this broad category that covers autism-spectrum conditions as well as deficits in attention and other cognitive, learning issues. Why is neurodiversity becoming a popular term? Is this a useful category for our kids? Jessica and Dr. Ken talk about the possible drawbacks to this category. Got questions or feedback? We want to hear from you! [email protected] Get the book here: https://www.amazon.com/Feeding-Mouth-That-Bites-You/dp/1514762374/ref=tmm_pap_swatch_0?_encoding=UTF8&qid=1667269257&sr=8-1 Music provided by the great John David Kent! - https://www.johndavidkent.com/
2024-03-12
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Episode 167: "Lost In Trans Nation" Dr. Miriam Grossman Interview (Part Two)

Today we share the second half of our interview with Dr. Miriam Grossman. Grossman is a board certified psychiatrist who has been educating parents about the misinformation that has all but hijacked the fields of psychiatry, psychology and virtually all other human sciences. Dr. Grossman?s practice currently focuses on gender-distressed young people and their parents. She believes that every child is born in the right body. Dr. Grossman is the author of five books and has been translated into eleven languages. She testified before Congress and lectured at the British House of Lords. You might have seen her interview in the documentary "What Is A Woman?" Be careful when ordering her book as there have been efforts by some to interfere with getting the right book. Best to order from here: https://www.miriamgrossmanmd.com/about-4-2 Got questions or feedback? We want to hear from you! [email protected] Get the book here: https://www.amazon.com/Feeding-Mouth-That-Bites-You/dp/1514762374/ref=tmm_pap_swatch_0?_encoding=UTF8&qid=1667269257&sr=8-1 Music provided by the great John David Kent! - https://www.johndavidkent.com/
2024-03-05
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Episode 166: "Lost in Trans Nation" We Interview Dr. Miriam Grossman MD (Part One)

We are so excited to have one of our heroes join us for an in-depth look at the ideology of gender diversity that is sweeping our country. Dr. Miriam Grossman is a board certified psychiatrist who has been educating parents about the misinformation that has all but hijacked the fields of psychiatry, psychology and virtually all other human sciences. Dr. Grossman?s practice currently focuses on gender-distressed young people and their parents. She believes that every child is born in the right body. Dr. Grossman is the author of five books and has been translated into eleven languages. She testified before Congress and lectured at the British House of Lords. You might have seen her interview in the documentary "What Is A Woman?" We are honored to present this first of a two part discussion. Be careful when ordering her book as there have been efforts by some to interfere with getting the right book. Best to order from here: https://www.miriamgrossmanmd.com/about-4-2 Got questions or feedback? We want to hear from you! [email protected] Get the book here: https://www.amazon.com/Feeding-Mouth-That-Bites-You/dp/1514762374/ref=tmm_pap_swatch_0?_encoding=UTF8&qid=1667269257&sr=8-1 Music provided by the great John David Kent! - https://www.johndavidkent.com/
2024-02-27
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Episode 165: Alcohol, Drugs And Vaping - Revisited

It's hard to believe how long it's been since we covered alcohol, drugs and vaping. Today we review the important differences between things that are bad for your teen and things that get them intoxicated. That difference is important! Also, Dr. Ken reviews the kind of craziness that can surround even normal sounding teens when they spend a lot of time around drunk kids. We also cover a brand new kind of nicotine delivery system (oh great)! Got questions or feedback? We want to hear from you! [email protected] Get the book here: https://www.amazon.com/Feeding-Mouth-That-Bites-You/dp/1514762374/ref=tmm_pap_swatch_0?_encoding=UTF8&qid=1667269257&sr=8-1 Music provided by the great John David Kent! - https://www.johndavidkent.com/
2024-02-20
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Episode 164: Parenting Teenagers In An Age Of Anxiety

Today we review yet another news article about increased anxiety in teenagers. What is causing so much anxiety among our teens today? How should parents respond to teenagers who are anxious about the world they face today? When parents worry unnecessarily about every teenage struggle they run the risk of implying their adolescents are powerless to face today's struggles. Dr. Ken focuses instead on the need to parent in ways that empower adolescents and encourage them to face the troubles of their world in ways we parents could never imagine. Today's episode refers to these articles: Today?s Teenagers: Anxious About Their Futures and Disillusioned by Politicians - https://www.nytimes.com/2024/01/29/upshot/teens-politics-mental-health.html How Anxiety Became Content - https://www.theatlantic.com/ideas/archive/2023/12/therapy-language-anxiety-mental-health/676325/ Got questions or feedback? We want to hear from you! [email protected] Get the book here: https://www.amazon.com/Feeding-Mouth-That-Bites-You/dp/1514762374/ref=tmm_pap_swatch_0?_encoding=UTF8&qid=1667269257&sr=8-1 Music provided by the great John David Kent! - https://www.johndavidkent.com/
2024-02-13
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Episode 163: Mentalization - Is Your Teen Good At Knowing Other People?

Does your teenager misread others? Are they able to read the motives and feelings of their peers? This is known as "mentalization." Since the COVID pandemic more and more adolescents are struggling to read others and this effects their peer relationships and all other social interactions. Today we talk about how parents can influence mentalization in their teens and encourage their relationships. Dr. Ken references David Brooks' book "How to Know a Person: The Art of Seeing Others Deeply and Being Deeply Seen" https://www.amazon.com/How-Know-Person-Seeing-Others/dp/059323006X/ref=asc_df_059323006X/?tag=hyprod-20&linkCode=df0&hvadid=647264363749&hvpos=&hvnetw=g&hvrand=11579897834764221685&hvpone=&hvptwo=&hvqmt=&hvdev=c&hvdvcmdl=&hvlocint=&hvlocphy=9026972&hvtargid=pla-1973418059256&psc=1&mcid=2b6838d100a03234bfccdfda564a7ab5 Got questions or feedback? We want to hear from you! [email protected] Get the book here: https://www.amazon.com/Feeding-Mouth-That-Bites-You/dp/1514762374/ref=tmm_pap_swatch_0?_encoding=UTF8&qid=1667269257&sr=8-1 Music provided by the great John David Kent! - https://www.johndavidkent.com/
2024-02-06
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Episode 162: What About Starting Planned Emancipation Earlier Than Thirteen?

We've had some listeners ask about starting Feeding The Mouth parenting early. You know, like what about that extra responsible, mature 11-year-old? Wouldn't it be better to encourage that kind of behavior with early Planned Emancipation? Dr. Ken's answer may surprise you. Got questions or feedback? We want to hear from you! [email protected] Get the book here: https://www.amazon.com/Feeding-Mouth-That-Bites-You/dp/1514762374/ref=tmm_pap_swatch_0?_encoding=UTF8&qid=1667269257&sr=8-1 Music provided by the great John David Kent! - https://www.johndavidkent.com/
2024-01-30
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Episode 161: When Teens Attract the Wrong Friends

What can parents do when their teenager seems to attract the wrong kind of friends? How is it that some adolescents seem to get in with the "good" kids in their school while others apparently struggle? Today we talk about the somewhat complex issue of teens who hang with the "wrong" sort of friend group. What causes some teens to gravitate to the wrong crowd? What can parents do about it? What about moving your teenager to a new school? We answer these and other questions surrounding teens and the "bad crowd." Got questions or feedback? We want to hear from you! [email protected] Get the book here: https://www.amazon.com/Feeding-Mouth-That-Bites-You/dp/1514762374/ref=tmm_pap_swatch_0?_encoding=UTF8&qid=1667269257&sr=8-1 Music provided by the great John David Kent! - https://www.johndavidkent.com/
2024-01-23
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Episode 160: Teenagers and Masturbation

NOTE: Today's episode isn't suitable for young children (obviously). We know it's hard to talk about masturbation with your kids but it's so important that you do. How did we go from a culture that lied about near fatal consequences of masturbation to a culture that celebrates it as some sort of "self-care"? Today we take on the topic of how to address masturbation with your teenagers. When should you bring it up? Who should your son or daughter talk to? This episode isn't for kids to listen to but parents definitely should. Dr. Ken references the book: "Every Young Man's Battle" https://www.amazon.com/Every-Young-Mans-Battle-Strategies/dp/0307457990/ref=sr_1_1?crid=3OBJ3JH43Z3MJ&keywords=every+young+man%27s+battle&qid=1705425383&sprefix=every+young+%2Caps%2C112&sr=8-1 Got questions or feedback? We want to hear from you! [email protected] Get the book here: https://www.amazon.com/Feeding-Mouth-That-Bites-You/dp/1514762374/ref=tmm_pap_swatch_0?_encoding=UTF8&qid=1667269257&sr=8-1 Music provided by the great John David Kent! - https://www.johndavidkent.com/
2024-01-16
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Episode 159: Make-Up, Hair, Nails and Teenagers

When should parents allow their kids to wear make-up? What if your daughter tells you that all her friends are wearing make-up? What about some "radical" hairstyle? How should you respond if you son wants to wear make-up? Today we use the "Feeding The Mouth" philosophy with issues related to make-up, hair and even super long fingernails! Got questions or feedback? We want to hear from you! [email protected] Get the book here: https://www.amazon.com/Feeding-Mouth-That-Bites-You/dp/1514762374/ref=tmm_pap_swatch_0?_encoding=UTF8&qid=1667269257&sr=8-1 Music provided by the great John David Kent! - https://www.johndavidkent.com/
2024-01-09
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Episode 158: "I Want My Teenager To Be Able To Tell Me Anything... Right?"

Did you talk to your parents the way your teen talks to you? Is that always a good thing? When does the priority of "you can be honest with your parents" become an excuse for teens to berate their parents? We hear from many parents struggling with their teenager's verbal tirades that leave them feeling exhausted and like they're failing as parents. How should parents handle this kind of verbal whipping from their teenagers? Is their a limit to the priority of being able to tell their parents anything? How should parents answer when teenagers criticize how they are being parented? We take on all these questions and more! Got questions or feedback? We want to hear from you! [email protected] Get the book here: https://www.amazon.com/Feeding-Mouth-That-Bites-You/dp/1514762374/ref=tmm_pap_swatch_0?_encoding=UTF8&qid=1667269257&sr=8-1 Music provided by the great John David Kent! - https://www.johndavidkent.com/
2023-12-19
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Episode 157: Hygiene Issues with Teenagers

Ever have to air out your car after driving your teen home from practice? Adolescence brings major changes to teens lives including how they smell! Today we tackle the tricky issue of parents intervening with adolescents with poor hygiene including not showering, not brushing their teeth and other basics. Teenagers are too old to use a checklist like a child so what can parents do? Dr. Ken discusses paying attention to underlying factors effecting this behavior as well as ways to effectively communicate about issues of personal hygiene with teenagers. Got questions or feedback? We want to hear from you! [email protected] Get the book here: https://www.amazon.com/Feeding-Mouth-That-Bites-You/dp/1514762374/ref=tmm_pap_swatch_0?_encoding=UTF8&qid=1667269257&sr=8-1 Music provided by the great John David Kent! - https://www.johndavidkent.com/
2023-12-12
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Episode 156: Grounding Teenagers

Today we talk about grounding your teenager. When should you ground them? What exactly does grounding include? Can they still use their phone while grounded? What about work or church activities. We even talk about what the maximum time limit for grounding to remain effective. What about when your ex won't enforce your grounding limits? We answer these and many more questions about using grounding to discipline your teenager. Got questions or feedback? We want to hear from you! [email protected] Get the book here: https://www.amazon.com/Feeding-Mouth-That-Bites-You/dp/1514762374/ref=tmm_pap_swatch_0?_encoding=UTF8&qid=1667269257&sr=8-1 Music provided by the great John David Kent! - https://www.johndavidkent.com/
2023-12-05
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Episode 155: Holidays, Grief and Teenagers

Each year we focus on some aspect of the holidays with teens. This year we want to focus in on those who are dealing with grief, loss and even depression around this time of year. What's different about how a parent should treat a teenager vs. a child when there's been a death, divorce or some other significant loss in a family's life? Is it better to just leave for the holidays and avoid facing grief? Why are teenagers sometimes the worst to have around when grieving and sometimes the best? We cover these and other topics (like whether canned or fresh cranberry sauce is better) as we head into the holidays. Got questions or feedback? We want to hear from you! [email protected] Get the book here: https://www.amazon.com/Feeding-Mouth-That-Bites-You/dp/1514762374/ref=tmm_pap_swatch_0?_encoding=UTF8&qid=1667269257&sr=8-1 Music provided by the great John David Kent! - https://www.johndavidkent.com/
2023-11-14
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Episode 154: Health Issues and Teenagers

Why can it be so hard just to help a teenager stay healthy? Today we answer listener questions about exercise, diet as well as medical issues that impact adolescent lives. How can parents deal with teenagers that seemingly ignore allergies and other dietary concerns that can affect their health? What about medications that my teen needs to take but hates to be reminded about? We even take on life-threatening health issues like Cystic Fibrosis which is one of several conditions that prove just how important a teenager's need for autonomy really is. Got questions or feedback? We want to hear from you! [email protected] Get the book here: https://www.amazon.com/Feeding-Mouth-That-Bites-You/dp/1514762374/ref=tmm_pap_swatch_0?_encoding=UTF8&qid=1667269257&sr=8-1 Music provided by the great John David Kent! - https://www.johndavidkent.com/
2023-11-07
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Episode 153: Helping Teenagers' Problems with Friendships and Social Groups

How can parents help their adolescents when they are having problems with their social group? What if my teen isn't really in a social group at all? Today we take on the increasingly difficult area of social relationships. In an era of increasing isolation, it is more important than ever for parents to do what they can (if anything) to encourage their teenagers to make, build and sustain social relationships with their peers. Got questions or feedback? We want to hear from you! [email protected] Get the book here: https://www.amazon.com/Feeding-Mouth-That-Bites-You/dp/1514762374/ref=tmm_pap_swatch_0?_encoding=UTF8&qid=1667269257&sr=8-1 Music provided by the great John David Kent! - https://www.johndavidkent.com/
2023-10-31
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Episode 152: "Why Is My Teenager Angry All The Time?"

Why do teenagers sometimes go through phases of being constantly angry and surly? Dr. Ken reviews the most common causes of teenager's anger and talks about some best ways to respond. We also take on the question of just how bad is it when your teenager seems to not like you. I mean, it gets better right?
2023-10-24
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Episode 151: When Teenagers Isolate In Their Rooms

Today we answer a common question from listeners, "How should I handle it when my teenager spends all their time in their room"? As you can guess, Dr. Ken starts with advice on avoiding a control battle but what to do after that? What is the reason they stay in there so much? Is this a sign of depression? Got questions or feedback? We want to hear from you! [email protected] Get the book here: https://www.amazon.com/Feeding-Mouth-That-Bites-You/dp/1514762374/ref=tmm_pap_swatch_0?_encoding=UTF8&qid=1667269257&sr=8-1 Music provided by the great John David Kent! - https://www.johndavidkent.com/
2023-10-17
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Episode 150: The Parenting "Finish Line" Part 2

This week we finish up our discussion from last week about dealing with adolescents after they finish high school. Many young adults live at home at least for some period of time after they have reached adulthood. What are the best ways to deal with conflicts that might arise? Are parents required to let their adult children stay in their home if they need it? What about uncomfortable questions about an adult kid who wants his boy/girlfriend to sleep over? A very relevant and down-to-earth discussion. Got questions or feedback? We want to hear from you! [email protected] Get the book here: https://www.amazon.com/Feeding-Mouth-That-Bites-You/dp/1514762374/ref=tmm_pap_swatch_0?_encoding=UTF8&qid=1667269257&sr=8-1 Music provided by the great John David Kent! - https://www.johndavidkent.com/
2023-10-10
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Episode 149: The Parenting "Finish Line" Part 1

Is there a time when parents are really done parenting? We get so many questions from parents who have invested so much in parenting their teens that they're not sure what to do after high school. While you'll always be their parent, their is a point where you should no longer push your help on your kids. Dr. Ken offers even more clarity on parents as a "benevolent bank." Got questions or feedback? We want to hear from you! [email protected] Get the book here: https://www.amazon.com/Feeding-Mouth-That-Bites-You/dp/1514762374/ref=tmm_pap_swatch_0?_encoding=UTF8&qid=1667269257&sr=8-1 Music provided by the great John David Kent! - https://www.johndavidkent.com/
2023-10-03
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Episode 148: Teens Who Resist Sports and Activities

We've gotten email questions about adolescents who resist involvement in any sport or activity. How can parents continue to implement planned emancipation if they have to sit a watch their teenager sit around and avoid getting involved with anything? What if your teen has been successful in a sport, music or something else but they suddenly decide they want to quit? Today Jessica and Dr. Ken talk about ways to offer freedom while still requiring involvement. Plus, we talk just a bit about the state of Texas' weird fascination with homecoming mums! Got questions or feedback? We want to hear from you! [email protected] Get the book here: https://www.amazon.com/Feeding-Mouth-That-Bites-You/dp/1514762374/ref=tmm_pap_swatch_0?_encoding=UTF8&qid=1667269257&sr=8-1 Music provided by the great John David Kent! - https://www.johndavidkent.com/
2023-09-26
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Episode 147: The Barbie Movie

Did you see the Barbie movie? Should you take a 12 year old girl to see it? You're not still limiting your 13 and older kids on what PG-13 movies they can see are you? Today Jessica and Dr. Ken discuss the implications of the summer blockbuster hit. Some movies are worth seeing and discussing with your daughters because they reflect current cultural issues well. How can Christians make use of a movie that captures much of the confusion and disappointments that today's culture struggles with? Got questions or feedback? We want to hear from you! [email protected] Get the book here: https://www.amazon.com/Feeding-Mouth-That-Bites-You/dp/1514762374/ref=tmm_pap_swatch_0?_encoding=UTF8&qid=1667269257&sr=8-1 Music provided by the great John David Kent! - https://www.johndavidkent.com/
2023-09-19
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Episode 146: The Burden of Parenting - Part Two

This week we conclude our discussion of "parenting" as the term has come to imply some "inside track" of parental knowledge that can, supposedly, guarantee a happy and successful kid. Dr. Ken shares the truth that not only is this burden carried mostly by moms but actually by middle-class, white moms. At least that's what New York Times columnist Ylonda Gault Caviness says. https://www.nytimes.com/2015/05/03/opinion/sunday/what-black-moms-know.html Carrying too much of this parenting burden can even result in adult children who blame parents when they should be taking responsibility for their own actions. Now, more than ever, Feeding The Mouth parents need to actively push back against these false expectations that leave too many parents feeling guilty and fearful. Maybe "Feeding The Mouth That Bites You" T-shirts? Got questions or feedback? We want to hear from you! [email protected] Get the book here: https://www.amazon.com/Feeding-Mouth-That-Bites-You/dp/1514762374/ref=tmm_pap_swatch_0?_encoding=UTF8&qid=1667269257&sr=8-1 Music provided by the great John David Kent! - https://www.johndavidkent.com/
2023-09-12
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Episode 145: The Burden of Parenting - Part One

Where did we get this idea that there's some "inside track" of techniques parents should be implementing to raise amazing children? Is there any evidence that parental influence can guarantee some level of success in their children? Why do so many parents live in fear that they're failing with their kids? Why does this fear burden mothers so much more than fathers? Today we take on the topic we hear most from our listeners. How to share helpful information to parents without burdening them with crushing expectations for themselves. Got questions or feedback? We want to hear from you! [email protected] Get the book here: https://www.amazon.com/Feeding-Mouth-That-Bites-You/dp/1514762374/ref=tmm_pap_swatch_0?_encoding=UTF8&qid=1667269257&sr=8-1 Music provided by the great John David Kent! - https://www.johndavidkent.com/
2023-09-05
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Episode 144: "You're Only Human" part 2 - Dr. Ken Interviews Dr. Kelly Kapic

Today we finish our great interview with Dr. Kelly Kapic, professor of theological studies at Covenant College in Lookout Mountain, Georgia. His book, "You're Only Human: How Your Limits Reflect God's Design and Why That's Good News" is a breath of fresh air for Christian parents who constantly struggle with their own limitations as parents. In this second part, Kelly talks about how personal limitations reflects the human need for support from others. Should we be careful about "co-dependency" and other toxic relationships? What does humility really mean from a Christian perspective? These and other things get thrown around in Dr. Ken and Kelly's discussion. This is part two of two episodes. You can find Kelly's book here: https://www.amazon.com/Youre-Only-Human-Limits-Reflect/dp/1587435101 Join us on Patreon for bonus content and more: https://www.patreon.com/FeedingTheMouthThatBitesYou Got questions or feedback? We want to hear from you! [email protected] Get the book here: https://www.amazon.com/Feeding-Mouth-That-Bites-You/dp/1514762374/ref=tmm_pap_swatch_0?_encoding=UTF8&qid=1667269257&sr=8-1
2023-06-06
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Episode 143: "You're Only Human" Dr. Ken Interviews Dr. Kelly Kapic

Most all parents constantly feel guilty that they're not doing enough for their kids. For Christian parents, does our faith make any difference when we suffer like this? Theology professor Kelly Kapic's most recent book, "You're Only Human" takes on this constant guilt and self-judgment. He reminds us that human limitations are not the same as sin. As a college professor he has seen first hand how so many of our kids are taught to have those same demands on themselves. Kelly is the author of several books including his award-winning, "Embodied Hope: A Theological Meditation on Pain and Suffering." He reminds us that our stress isn't a time-management problem, it's a theological problem of knowing who God is and how he wants us to live into the world he created. This is part one of two episodes. You can find Kelly's book here: https://www.amazon.com/Youre-Only-Human-Limits-Reflect/dp/1587435101 Join us on Patreon for bonus content and more: https://www.patreon.com/FeedingTheMouthThatBitesYou Got questions or feedback? We want to hear from you! [email protected] Get the book here: https://www.amazon.com/Feeding-Mouth-That-Bites-You/dp/1514762374/ref=tmm_pap_swatch_0?_encoding=UTF8&qid=1667269257&sr=8-1
2023-05-30
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Episode 142: Another "Dr. Ken's Essentials" - Entitlement in Teenagers

We continue paring down some of the vast amount of information and focus on the critical elements that are sometimes lost. Today Dr. Ken revives a discussion about entitlement and the damage this does to children of all ages. How can parents avoid overly entitled teenagers? What if parents haven't focused on this before but decide they need to now? Also, isn't "entitled" just a nice way of saying "spoiled?" Join us on Patreon for bonus content and more: https://www.patreon.com/FeedingTheMouthThatBitesYou Got questions or feedback? We want to hear from you! [email protected] Get the book here: https://www.amazon.com/Feeding-Mouth-That-Bites-You/dp/1514762374/ref=tmm_pap_swatch_0?_encoding=UTF8&qid=1667269257&sr=8-1
2023-05-23
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Episode 141: Dr. Ken's "Feeding The Mouth" Essentials

Summer's coming, Jessica and Ashley are swamped so Dr. Ken shares some of the essentials of "Feeding The Mouth" parenting. Today we revisit questions about phone limits, when your kid has been drinking, "dab" pens, driving and more. There's a lot of information out there but focusing in on the more common issues can, hopefully, remind us of what a Planned Emancipation approach can accomplish and also that you are no alone in dealing with these issues. Join us on Patreon for bonus content and more: https://www.patreon.com/FeedingTheMouthThatBitesYou Got questions or feedback? We want to hear from you! [email protected] Get the book here: https://www.amazon.com/Feeding-Mouth-That-Bites-You/dp/1514762374/ref=tmm_pap_swatch_0?_encoding=UTF8&qid=1667269257&sr=8-1
2023-05-12
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Episode 140: "Why Are You Telling Me This?" Complications In Communicating With Teens

Having a relationship where your teenager shares everything with their parents is a good thing... right? Today we talk about complications in the idealistic expectation that parents want teenagers who tell them everything that is going on in their lives. Sometimes there's reason to actually ask a teenager, "... why are you telling me this?" After all, did you tell your parents everything you did when you were a teenager? Dr. Ken even admits a secret he never told his parents! Join us on Patreon for bonus content and more: https://www.patreon.com/FeedingTheMouthThatBitesYou Got questions or feedback? We want to hear from you! [email protected] Get the book here: https://www.amazon.com/Feeding-Mouth-That-Bites-You/dp/1514762374/ref=tmm_pap_swatch_0?_encoding=UTF8&qid=1667269257&sr=8-1
2023-04-25
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Episode 139: Trash Talk, Verbal Sparring and Teenagers

Jessica and Ashley revive an axiom they learned in a Bible study, "our words should build, bless and benefit." How could any Christian parent disagree with these goals for our children? Well... Dr. Ken has some concerns! Today we consider the purpose of words that may seem critical. Verbal sparring can be an advanced form of "rough-housing" which, research indicates, can be helpful for children and teenagers. We also discuss the necessity of connection in shared humor and put-downs. How can parents help teens navigate these choppy social waters? Join us on Patreon for bonus content and more: https://www.patreon.com/FeedingTheMouthThatBitesYou Got questions or feedback? We want to hear from you! [email protected] Get the book here: https://www.amazon.com/Feeding-Mouth-That-Bites-You/dp/1514762374/ref=tmm_pap_swatch_0?_encoding=UTF8&qid=1667269257&sr=8-1
2023-04-18
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Episode 138: A Spring Checklist For Feeding The Mouth Parents

This week we review a checklist of the stuff parents need to be doing this spring to move planned emancipation along. Especially for parents of high school seniors, now is the time to be mostly finished with giving over freedoms including... electronics, attending church etc. Scary stuff but necessary to finish well. We also talk about items on the list for parents of early and middle adolescents. Now is the time to be thinking about summer jobs, camps etc. We cover these and other items on your "spring Feeding The Mouth checklist." Join us on Patreon for bonus content and more: https://www.patreon.com/FeedingTheMouthThatBitesYou Got questions or feedback? We want to hear from you! [email protected] Get the book here: https://www.amazon.com/Feeding-Mouth-That-Bites-You/dp/1514762374/ref=tmm_pap_swatch_0?_encoding=UTF8&qid=1667269257&sr=8-1
2023-04-11
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Episode 137: How To Talk To Teens About School Shootings

School shootings only add to parents' fears for their child's safety and well-being. These fears make it hard for parents to know how to or even if they should talk to their kids about these events. As you might guess, Dr. Ken suggests there are important differences in the way parents should talk to children vs adolescents. Is this the time to talk about gun-control or mental health laws? Is it bad to let teenagers see your own emotional reactions? What if my teenager is uncomfortable with praying in times like these? Join us on Patreon for bonus content and more: https://www.patreon.com/FeedingTheMouthThatBitesYou Got questions or feedback? We want to hear from you! [email protected] Get the book here: https://www.amazon.com/Feeding-Mouth-That-Bites-You/dp/1514762374/ref=tmm_pap_swatch_0?_encoding=UTF8&qid=1667269257&sr=8-1
2023-04-04
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Episode 136: Parents Who Can't Stop Checking, Nagging Or Reminding Their Teens

Once a parent has given over an area of freedom to their teenager, they must NOT continue to check and remind their kid about it. Letting the natural consequences of your teen's choices fall on them is necessary to teens developing responsibility in managing more and more areas of their lives. On the other hand, parents shouldn't be saddled with constantly "biting their tongue" while watching them make poor choices. Today we discuss this difficult balance between leaving teens to make their own choices while communicating with them when they seem to be making bad choices. Join us on Patreon for bonus content and more: https://www.patreon.com/FeedingTheMouthThatBitesYou Got questions or feedback? We want to hear from you! [email protected] Get the book here: https://www.amazon.com/Feeding-Mouth-That-Bites-You/dp/1514762374/ref=tmm_pap_swatch_0?_encoding=UTF8&qid=1667269257&sr=8-1
2023-03-28
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Episode 135: Teens, Femininity And Feminism

In a world that insists that there are no real differences between men and women, how can parents help their daughters navigate this confusion? Today we talk about the successes and failures of feminism for our girls. We also talk about empowering girls in their femininity rather than needing to be "just like a boy." Dr. Ken references the book by Louise Perry, "The Case Against The Sexual Revolution" Join us on Patreon for bonus content and more: https://www.patreon.com/FeedingTheMouthThatBitesYou Got questions or feedback? We want to hear from you! [email protected] Get the book here: https://www.amazon.com/Feeding-Mouth-That-Bites-You/dp/1514762374/ref=tmm_pap_swatch_0?_encoding=UTF8&qid=1667269257&sr=8-1
2023-03-22
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Episode 134: Teens And Toxic Masculinity

What is "toxic masculinity?" How can parents encourage healthy masculinity? Today we take on a somewhat provocative topic for today. What is a healthy way to encourage real "male-ness" in a culture that is denying any "real" masculine and feminine traits in our children? What can moms do to encourage healthy masculinity in their sons? What is the role of fathers in this struggle? Join us on Patreon for bonus content and more: https://www.patreon.com/FeedingTheMouthThatBitesYou Got questions or feedback? We want to hear from you! [email protected] Get the book here: https://www.amazon.com/Feeding-Mouth-That-Bites-You/dp/1514762374/ref=tmm_pap_swatch_0?_encoding=UTF8&qid=1667269257&sr=8-1
2023-03-14
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Episode 133: Teens And Life Purpose

Adolescents who feel a sense of purpose in life report overall higher levels of happiness and life satisfaction. What are parents to do with such information? Particularly, how does this relate to Christian parents? We cover this and other implications of such research results plus you get to listen whether Dr. Ken and Ashley were right to gang up on Jessica's desire for her children to be "world changers!" Join us on Patreon for bonus content and more: https://www.patreon.com/FeedingTheMouthThatBitesYou Got questions or feedback? We want to hear from you! [email protected] Get the book here: https://www.amazon.com/Feeding-Mouth-That-Bites-You/dp/1514762374/ref=tmm_pap_swatch_0?_encoding=UTF8&qid=1667269257&sr=8-1
2023-03-07
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Episode 132: Teenagers and psychiatric hospitals

Is there ever a time when parents should send their teenager to a psychiatric facility? (Please don't call them "mental hospitals") Today we discuss the situations that require parents to consider having their adolescent evaluated for psychiatric hospitalization. We also cover when parents might need to consider long-term, residential treatment as well as the negative effects of NOT considering hospitalization when it's really needed. Join us on Patreon for bonus content and more: https://www.patreon.com/FeedingTheMouthThatBitesYou Got questions or feedback? We want to hear from you! [email protected] Get the book here: https://www.amazon.com/Feeding-Mouth-That-Bites-You/dp/1514762374/ref=tmm_pap_swatch_0?_encoding=UTF8&qid=1667269257&sr=8-1
2023-02-28
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Episode 131: Dads Speak: Dr. Ken Interviews Jessica And Ashley's Husbands

This week Dr. Ken gets honest with Jessica and Ashley's husbands, Charlie and Brett. Dad's have a different take on parenting and we dive into that as well as what it's like to have wives who already "know all this stuff." Brett and Charlie get honest about what they like and DON'T like about Feeding The Mouth That Bites You. This is only a taste of the full interview where we cover fathering teenage boys vs. girls, grandparent involvement, handling disagreements with your wife and much more. For the full interview go to our Patreon website at: https://www.patreon.com/FeedingTheMouthThatBitesYou Got questions or feedback? We want to hear from you! [email protected] Get the book here: https://www.amazon.com/Feeding-Mouth-That-Bites-You/dp/1514762374/ref=tmm_pap_swatch_0?_encoding=UTF8&qid=1667269257&sr=8-1
2023-02-21
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Episode 130: Teenagers and siblings

We've already talked about sibling rivalry (see episode 24) but today we talk about teenagers' relationships with siblings in general. How can parents cultivate good relationships between their children? What are ways that parents inadvertently discourage mature relationships between siblings? And, as always, what are some particular aspects of the adolescent phase of development that make this hard? Are there aspects of adolescence that parents can use to their advantage in helping sibling relationships? Join us on Patreon for bonus content and more: https://www.patreon.com/FeedingTheMouthThatBitesYou Got questions or feedback? We want to hear from you! [email protected] Get the book here: https://www.amazon.com/Feeding-Mouth-That-Bites-You/dp/1514762374/ref=tmm_pap_swatch_0?_encoding=UTF8&qid=1667269257&sr=8-1
2023-02-17
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Episode 129: Help! It's Not Working!

What do you do when you implement Planned Emancipation but things don't seem to be getting any better? It's not uncommon that we hear from parents who feel that Feeding The Mouth parenting isn't making the kind of difference they were expecting. To address this, Dr. Ken clarifies what kind of expectations are realistic for Feeding The Mouth parenting. Also, we focus on the intangibles that can cause teenagers to still feel over-controlled even though parents are trying to give freedoms. So, take a deep breath, Feeding The Mouth parenting isn't always an overnight "fix" but remains an essential adjustment to your household in a culture that has no idea how to translate children into adulthood. Join us on Patreon for bonus content and more: https://www.patreon.com/FeedingTheMouthThatBitesYou Got questions or feedback? We want to hear from you! [email protected] Get the book here: https://www.amazon.com/Feeding-Mouth-That-Bites-You/dp/1514762374/ref=tmm_pap_swatch_0?_encoding=UTF8&qid=1667269257&sr=8-1
2023-02-07
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Episode 128: "Good Enough" Parenting

In the 1950s, British pediatrician and psychoanalyst Donald Winnicott introduced the concept of "good enough" parenting and Dr. Ken thinks it's time we brought it back! Parents worry so much about doing parenting "right" and put a lot of pressure on themselves. Even worse, there's this idea that maybe there's some book that you haven't read that tells you how to raise your kids "the right way." Dr. Ken doesn't believe that "perfect parenting" book exists and "Feeding The Mouth That Bites You" is not that book either. All parents do things they shouldn't have done and fail to do things they should have done and yet they've done their job well enough for their kids to succeed. Parents' over-focus on their own parenting failures runs the risk of disrespecting their teens who are old enough to make their own mistakes. Join us on Patreon for bonus content and more: https://www.patreon.com/FeedingTheMouthThatBitesYou Got questions or feedback? We want to hear from you! [email protected] Get the book here: https://www.amazon.com/Feeding-Mouth-That-Bites-You/dp/1514762374/ref=tmm_pap_swatch_0?_encoding=UTF8&qid=1667269257&sr=8-1
2023-01-31
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Episode 127: Teenagers And Sleepovers

Today we take on the sometimes scary topic of sleepovers with teenagers. Strangely, many parents are less concerned about sleepovers when their kids are younger only to "shut it down" when they become teenagers. What kind of boundaries are reasonable for teenagers wanting to spend the night with friends? Although it's becoming more common, is it ever ok to allow boys and girls to spend the night? What do you do when you know that your teen or their friend has declared themselves to be gay or bisexual? Wouldn't it just be easier to declare a moratorium on the whole thing? Join us on Patreon for bonus content and more: https://www.patreon.com/FeedingTheMouthThatBitesYou Got questions or feedback? We want to hear from you! [email protected] Get the book here: https://www.amazon.com/Feeding-Mouth-That-Bites-You/dp/1514762374/ref=tmm_pap_swatch_0?_encoding=UTF8&qid=1667269257&sr=8-1
2023-01-24
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Episode 126: Culture And Feeding The Mouth That Bites You

How Does Feeding The Mouth parenting work in different cultures? Today we talk about the expectations that immigrant parents bring with them to a new culture and how that impacts parenting. Also, we discuss taking Feeding The Mouth parenting with you into a different culture from your own. How can parents maintain impact on their teenagers when the culture around them is changing so fast? Join us on Patreon for bonus content and more: https://www.patreon.com/FeedingTheMouthThatBitesYou Got questions or feedback? We want to hear from you! [email protected] Get the book here: https://www.amazon.com/Feeding-Mouth-That-Bites-You/dp/1514762374/ref=tmm_pap_swatch_0?_encoding=UTF8&qid=1667269257&sr=8-1
2023-01-17
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Episode 125: Teens And Therapy: Don't They Just Lie?

Parents often have questions about the effectiveness of therapy for teenagers. Many will ask, "How can a therapist tell when a teenager is just lying to them?" Turns out, that's not as common a problem as you might think. Today we take on this issue and other aspects of therapy for adolescents and adults for that matter! Join us on Patreon for bonus content and more: https://www.patreon.com/FeedingTheMouthThatBitesYou Got questions or feedback? We want to hear from you! [email protected] Get the book here: https://www.amazon.com/Feeding-Mouth-That-Bites-You/dp/1514762374/ref=tmm_pap_swatch_0?_encoding=UTF8&qid=1667269257&sr=8-1
2023-01-10
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Episode 124: Teens And The Holidays - A Refresher

Just in time for the holidays. Let's review some of the main things to remember when your adolescents are out for the holidays or even when your graduates come home from college or wherever. How can parents involve their teens in holiday family activities without compromising their sense of autonomy? What do we do with our kid's "plus one?" We cover these and other holiday topics just in time. We'll be taking a break ourselves... see you January 10th! Join us on Patreon for bonus content and more: https://www.patreon.com/FeedingTheMouthThatBitesYou Got questions or feedback? We want to hear from you! [email protected] Get the book here: https://www.amazon.com/Feeding-Mouth-That-Bites-You/dp/1514762374/ref=tmm_pap_swatch_0?_encoding=UTF8&qid=1667269257&sr=8-1
2022-12-20
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Episode 123: Preparing For An Empty Nest

The goal of Feeding The Mouth parenting is for your kids to leave your home and start their own. But what about getting your life ready for life without kids around? Today we talk about preparing for empty nesting. When should parents start getting ready for this? What steps should we take in getting ready? Is it bad for my kids to see me almost happy that they are leaving? We answer these and other questions on today's episode. Join us on Patreon for bonus content and more: https://www.patreon.com/FeedingTheMouthThatBitesYou Got questions or feedback? We want to hear from you! [email protected] Get the book here: https://www.amazon.com/Feeding-Mouth-That-Bites-You/dp/1514762374/ref=tmm_pap_swatch_0?_encoding=UTF8&qid=1667269257&sr=8-1
2022-12-13
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Episode 122: Teens Sending And Receiving Nudes

What do you do when you find out your teenager has sent or received nude photos of themselves or others? Is the issue of nude photos the same problem if you have a daughter or a son? Nude photos shared among teenagers can be one of the scariest issues parents can think of. Is my kid gonna end up in jail for sending child pornography? What if it's just "normal" sexting while dating? As usual, we seek an EFFECTIVE way to prepare your teen to manage this issue since angry "scared straight" speeches tend to fall a bit flat. LISTENER WARNING: This episode discusses mature content that isn't suitable for young children. Join us on Patreon for bonus content and more: https://www.patreon.com/FeedingTheMouthThatBitesYou Got questions or feedback? We want to hear from you! [email protected] Get the book here: https://www.amazon.com/Feeding-Mouth-That-Bites-You/dp/1514762374/ref=tmm_pap_swatch_0?_encoding=UTF8&qid=1667269257&sr=8-1
2022-12-06
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Episode 121: Parenting In Reverse

Today we focus on the best way to parent when your kids are young so they will be most prepared for planned emancipation when they reach adolescence. Dr. Ken is concerned about a kind of parenting that reverses the healthy pattern of teaching and disciplining young children followed by conscious releasing control in adolescence. "Reverse parenting" is the temptation many parents follow to allow their younger children too much freedom when young and then being surprised when freedoms given in in adolescence are of little impact.Are you "parenting in reverse?" Dr Ken refers to the book: 12 Rules for Life: An Antidote to Chaos; Jordan Peterson - https://www.amazon.com/12-Rules-Life-Antidote-Chaos/dp/0141988517/ref=tmm_pap_swatch_0?_encoding=UTF8&qid=1669689083&sr=8-1 Join us on Patreon for bonus content and more: https://www.patreon.com/FeedingTheMouthThatBitesYou Got questions or feedback? We want to hear from you! [email protected] Get the book here: https://www.amazon.com/Feeding-Mouth-That-Bites-You/dp/1514762374/ref=tmm_pap_swatch_0?_encoding=UTF8&qid=1667269257&sr=8-1
2022-11-29
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Episode 120: It's Time For More... FAQs! (part 2 of 2)

Today we keep plowing through our listener questions. We take on issues surrounding giving school freedoms when your teen is home-schooled. How should a parent handle when your kid is dating someone who's parent isn't following planned emancipation and is bad-mouthing your parenting?! Do you handle school freedoms differently if your kid has a learning difference and is even failing some or many classes? We tackle these and more FAQ's in this second part of a 2-part episode. Join us on Patreon for bonus content and more: https://www.patreon.com/FeedingTheMouthThatBitesYou Get the book here: https://www.amazon.com/Feeding-Mouth-That-Bites-You/dp/1514762374/ref=tmm_pap_swatch_0?_encoding=UTF8&qid=1667269257&sr=8-1
2022-11-22
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Episode 119: It's Time For More... FAQs! (part 1 of 2)

It's been awhile since we've answered listener questions so we dive in for two episodes! Today we discuss important issues like, should teenagers EVER be given the freedom to skip school? How should parents handle boundaries such as sleep-overs if their teenager has expressed that they are gay? How do you manage limits on screen time when your kid needs to be on the computer for school? We take on these and other issues including a question that Dr Ken has actually never heard before! (Maybe we should give prizes for that.) Join us on Patreon for bonus content and more: https://www.patreon.com/FeedingTheMouthThatBitesYou Get the book here: https://www.amazon.com/Feeding-Mouth-That-Bites-You/dp/1514762374/ref=tmm_pap_swatch_0?_encoding=UTF8&qid=1667269257&sr=8-1
2022-11-15
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