Black Girls Heal
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#162: Dealing with Seasons of Conflict
In today?s episode, we?re talking about how to deal when you are in a season of conflict. Whether it be with people from your past or in the present, my hope is that the 4 things I share in this episode will support you navigate this season.
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#161: Going from Love Avoidant to Love Available
In today's episode, we review going from Love Avoidant to Love Available using the Healed and Loved Woman framework model.
MENTIONED IN THIS EPISODE
No Contact & Detox Support Kit
The Recovery School: Self Healing Track
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#160: The No Contact Process as a Healing Tool for Love Addiction
Let's talk about using a 90 day no contact period as a reset tool to help you gain clarity.
We talk about the why and the process within inside.
Click here to get the No Contact & Detox Kit
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$159: Don't Text Them (Sit on Your F'ing Hands)
In this episode, we're talking to anyone who is currently in a love addictive cycle and needs to pull back to reset and regain their sense of self.
This is not a full no contact episode, but just a challenge to pull back and not initiate for week to gain some clarity.
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Bonus Episode: October Catch Up with Shena
In this bonus episode, you can catch up with me about the things I am personally learning and applying in my life for pleasure, fun and healing that I'd like to share. A tiny bit of tea is spilled, and though impromptu lessons may happen, this is not a full teaching episode.
Feel free to stay and listen if you'd like to learn more about me or binge our archive. Either way, we hope you enjoy!
Things Mentioned:
Cosmic Vibrations (the TikTok astrocartographers I follow)
Book: The Art of Receiving and Giving by Dr. Betty Martin
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#158: Heart to Heart: Not Losing Your Self in a New Relationship
In this episode, Shena coaches an audience member on how to not lose herself in her new relationship.
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#157: Making Running the Household Fair with Laura Danger
What happens when running the household feels imbalanced, unfair, and it's causing discord with you and your partner?
In this episode, Laura Danger joins us to talk about the tool of the Fair Play Method and how to implement it into your relationship.
Connect with Our Guest
Website: thatdarnchat.com
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#156: It Gets Better...
In this episode, we want to normalize that, even though the healing process can be difficult at first, it does get better and evens out.
We hope breaking down what happens and what to expect helps you know that the light is coming soon.
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#155: Setting Unrealistic Expectations Based on Fantasy
Can we "break our own heart" by creating unrealistic expectations for others based on our fantasies of who we want them to be?
Let's talk about it in today's episode.
MENTIONED IN THIS EPISODE:
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#154: The Healed and Loved Woman: From Love Addicted to Love Balanced
It's time for our annual recap of our Healed and Loved Woman Framework. In this episode, we talk about the characteristics of going from being Love Addicted to Love Balanced.
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#153: When You Like Someone as a Love Avoidant
What does it look like to be available to others after you've been working on your love avoidance symptoms.
In this episode, I share 3 tips for those who are starting this journey building relationships in a different way.
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#152: When You Like Someone as a Love Addict
What does it look like to be balanced and still available after you've been working on your love addiction symptoms.
In this episode, I share 3 tips for those who are starting this journey building relationships in a different way.
CLICK HERE TO REGISTER FOR OUR FINAL OPEN HOUSE ON TUESDAY, AUGUST 30th at 6:30PM CST
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#151: Grieving Being Let Down at Your Big Events
Sometimes family and loved ones don't rise to the occassion and show up for us as we need them to at our big events (i.e. weddings, graduations, birthday parties, child births, etc). This abandonment is a real form of trauma.
In this episode, I discuss what to do to emotionally prepare yourself if you have an event coming that you fear you may be disappointed and also coping with your feelings if something hurtful has happened before.
Click here to Register for Our Open House on Tuesday, August 30th at 6:30pm CST
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#150: Feeling Whatever You Need to Feel About Your Past Relationship
When relationships do not work out (Friendship, romantic, familial, or otherwise) we can have a variety of emotional responses: neutrality, intense longing and love, hatred and rage, and any combination in between.
In this episode, we talk about how you are allowed to have whatever emotions you need to have about this relationship in this season.
Register for our Recovery School Open House - Click here to Save your Seat
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#149: Enabling vs Empowering
In this episode, we talk about the difference between disempowering helping (enabling) and empowerment.
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#138: Breaking the Habit of Self Criticism
Pulling from the title of the book, "Breaking the Habit of Being Yourself," we're talking about the importance of doing the actions that you have learned to do to create change.
Register for our final Enrollment Open House
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#147: Hurt Feelings, Codependency, and Letting What I Give Be Enough
Even healers can overgive and need to be mindful of triggers. I break down a recent event and how it triggered me and next steps I'm taking to move forward.
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Transitions
Things are changing. It's time to grow.
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#146: 5 Truths for Love Addicts Healing from Heartbreak
Heartbreak is really hard for love addicts. Especially when we're still holding on. This episode is to give 5 truths for love addicts healing for heartbreak.
Click here to register for our next open house for The Recovery School
RESOURCES MENTIONED
Join our weekly text inspiration list by texting PODCAST to 832-219-7815Enroll in our Coaching Signature Program for single and partnered women: From Addicted & Avoidant to AvailableCome to our next Healed and Loved Woman RetreatCONNECT WITH US ELSEWHERE
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Now introducing our brother podcast, For the Fellas
I'm sooo excited to share the debut of our brother podcast, For the Fellas
Click here to listen now on Apple Podcasts
Follow our website: forthefellas.org
Follow us on IG: @forthefellaspodcast
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Join our weekly text inspiration list by texting PODCAST to 832-219-7815 Enroll in our Coaching Signature Program for single and partnered women: From Addicted & Avoidant to Available Come to our next Healed and Loved Woman Retreat
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#145: The Importance of Bids and Repairs in Your Relationship
Pulling from the work of Dr. John Gottman, we talk about the importance of bids and repairs to the health of a relationships.
Click here to learn more about Dr. John & Dr. Julie Gottman's work
Register for the Let Them Love You Workshop live in Houston, TX
RESOURCES MENTIONED
Join our weekly text inspiration list by texting PODCAST to 832-219-7815 Enroll in our Coaching Signature Program for single and partnered women: From Addicted & Avoidant to Available Come to our next Healed and Loved Woman Retreat
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#144: How to Let Your Partner Have Their Own Feelings
Your partner is their own person with their own feelings. But sometimes those feelings can be triggering to us even when they don't intend it to be.
In this episode, we go over 3 things to keep in mind to help you allow your partner to have their own emotional experience.
Ready to let your loved ones in or provide space for those who want to love you? Check out the Let Them Love You Workshop to gain skills and make love easier.
Register for the Let Them Love You Workshop
RESOURCES MENTIONED
Join our weekly text inspiration list by texting PODCAST to 832-219-7815 Enroll in our Coaching Signature Program for single and partnered women: From Addicted & Avoidant to Available Come to our next Healed and Loved Woman Retreat
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#143: 5 Signs You Feel Protected in a Relationship
In this episode, I will talk about 5 signs that you are in a relationship where you are feeling protected and seen.
Ready to let your loved ones in or provide space for those who want to love you? Check out the Let Them Love You Workshop to gain skills and make love easier.
Register for the Let Them Love You Workshop
RESOURCES MENTIONED
Join our weekly text inspiration list by texting PODCAST to 832-219-7815 Enroll in our Coaching Signature Program for single and partnered women: From Addicted & Avoidant to Available Come to our next Healed and Loved Woman Retreat
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#142: Just checking in with you and sending love
The last few weeks have been tough.
I just wanted to send you all some love
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#141: Musings about ADHD, Diagnoses, and What Works for Me
Touching base this week in a mini-epiosde talking about learning to take space to figure out what works for me with my ADHD
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#140: Your Trauma and Your (Conflictual) Relationship w/ Your Daughter
In this episode we're going to talk about what it may look like along with 9 steps for you to take to work through this.
Click here to Join You Are Worthy
Click here to Join The Loved Woman Foundations
RESOURCES MENTIONED
Join our weekly text inspiration list by texting PODCAST to 832-219-7815 Enroll in our Coaching Signature Program for single and partnered women: From Addicted & Avoidant to Available Come to our next Healed and Loved Woman Retreat
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#139: Grieving The Relationship You Never Had With Your Mother
If you have felt sad or disheartened because you haven't been able to build the relationship you want with your mother, this podcast is for you. Let's talk about how to grieve your relationship with your mother even if she is physically present.
Click here to enroll in The Loved Woman Foundations Course
RESOURCES MENTIONED
Join our weekly text inspiration list by texting PODCAST to 832-219-7815 Enroll in our Coaching Signature Program for single and partnered women: From Addicted & Avoidant to Available Come to our next Healed and Loved Woman Retreat
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#138: Getting unstuck via self-forgiveness
Let's break down was living in self forgiveness looks like so we can move forward!
RESOURCES MENTIONED
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#137: 4 Ways to Exit Love Deprivation
Enroll in The Loved Woman Foundations Course
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#136: On Being Triggered (My Repair Episode)
Let's talk about what it looks like when we're triggered, how we respond, and healthier next steps to take.
This episode is a replacement of the episode aired earlier this week.
RESOURCES MENTIONED
Join our weekly text inspiration list by texting PODCAST to 832-219-7815 Enroll in our Coaching Signature Program for single and partnered women: From Addicted & Avoidant to Available Come to our next Healed and Loved Woman Retreat
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#135: Inspiration for You - Bodywork Healing, Motivation, and the Power Inside
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#134: Lessons Learned from Divorcing
Making the right decision for yourself is hard, and it can make you go through a lot of back and forth.
In today's episode, I talk about some lessons I learned during this process.
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Join our weekly text inspiration list by texting PODCAST to 832-219-7815 Enroll in our Coaching Signature Program for single and partnered women: From Addicted & Avoidant to Available Come to our next Healed and Loved Woman Retreat
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#133: Finding Your Voice in Your Recovery Journey
As you're recovering, it takes so much work and inner reflection to find your voice and what's true for YOU and the relationships you want to cultivate.
In today's episode, we talk with our amazing student Shandalla about the journey she has taken to find her voice and the lessons learned along the way.
RESOURCES MENTIONED
Join our weekly text inspiration list by texting PODCAST to 832-219-7815 Enroll in our Coaching Signature Program for single and partnered women: From Addicted & Avoidant to Available Come to our next Healed and Loved Woman Retreat
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#132: Asking for What You Need Emotionally in Friendships
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#131: Fighting Perfectionism with Dr. Marcuetta Sims
In this episode, Dr. Marcuetta Sims breaks down what perfectionism looks like in our lives and how to work through it.
RESOURCES MENTIONED
Join our weekly text inspiration list by texting PODCAST to 832-219-7815 Enroll in our Signature Program for single and partnered women: From Addicted & Avoidant to Available
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#130: When They Undervalue You on Valentine's Day (or you Birthday, Anniversary, Etc...)
It is totally okay for you if the holidays are important for you in a relationship. You deserve to feel special.
This episode is in support of women who may have felt overlooked and forgotten by partners on special holidays like Valentine's Day, Birthdays, Anniversaries, and others habitually.
RESOURCES MENTIONED
Join our weekly text inspiration list by texting PODCAST to 832-219-7815 Enroll in our Signature Program for single and partnered women: From Addicted & Avoidant to Available
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#129: Being a Healed and Loved Woman
We are recapping the Healed and Loved Woman Framework to embody being balanced, available, and worthy in our relationships.
Click here to join us at our retreats
RESOURCES MENTIONED
Join our weekly text inspiration list by texting PODCAST to 832-219-7815 Apply to work together in From Avoidant to Available
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#128: God is not calling you to be abused
Period.
In this episode, we are talking about domestic violence, why it is NOT the same of other typical couple conflict, and support for Christian women who may feel conflicted with leaving.
Note: Though this episode pulls from Christian teaching, the message is for everyone who needs it.
Domestic Violence Hotline (call, chat, or text for free 24/7)
The National Center Against Domestic Violence
RESOURCES
Join our weekly text inspiration list by texting PODCAST to 832-219-7815 Apply to work together in From Avoidant to Available Create balance and love in your life with The Loved Woman Planner
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#127: Internalized Misogyny & Love Addiction
In a current social trend that is pushing misogyny at length as self help, in this episode, we're looking at some common examples of internalized misogyny love addicts and codependents may face due to trauma, examples of alternative mindsets, and encouragement to be kind with oneself and self-forgive while unlearning these patterns.
RESOURCES MENTIONED
Join our weekly text inspiration list by texting PODCAST to 832-219-7815 Apply to work together in From Avoidant to Available
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#126: 5 Things I'm Doing to Cultivate Friendships
RESOURCES MENTIONED
Join our weekly text inspiration list by texting PODCAST to 832-219-7815 Join The Recovery School 2.0 to unlearn symptoms of love addiction and love avoidance Apply to work together in From Avoidant to Available Create balance and love in your life with The Loved Woman Planner
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Checking In - It's Okay to be Tired (Covid related)
It's okay to be over it. Checking in a little bit.
Resources
Join our weekly text inspiration list by texting PODCAST to 832-219-7815 Join The Recovery School 2.0 to unlearn symptoms of love addiction and love avoidance Apply to work together in From Avoidant to Available Create balance and love in your life with The Loved Woman Planner
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#124: Why You Gotta Take a Break!
Rest is SOOO important. It's really about how we treat ourselves and how we feel about ourselves.
We talk about how not resting is a fight or flight response and the importance of being aggressive about protecting your peace.
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RESOURCES MENTIONED
Join our weekly text inspiration list by texting PODCAST to 832-219-7815 Join The Recovery School 2.0 to unlearn symptoms of love addiction and love avoidance Apply to work together in From Avoidant to Available Create balance and love in your life with The Loved Woman Planner
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#123: Coping with Family Estrangement with Violetta Fernandez
Family Estrangement is super painful and can hard to navigate, especially during the holidays.
Therapist Violetta Fernandez breaks it down for us and also how to cope with it.
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#122: The 3 Things You Don't Need to Apologize For
There are three things we never need to apologize for. Our boundaries, our identity, and our voice are so important and valuable to us.
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Join our weekly text inspiration list by texting PODCAST to 832-219-7815 Join The Recovery School 2.0 to unlearn symptoms of love addiction and love avoidance Apply to work together in From Avoidant to Available Create balance and love in your life with The Loved Woman Planner
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#121: When You're Afraid to Try Again in Relationships
Have you been procrastinating putting yourself out there and making yourself available to get to know others? Then this one is for you. It's time to stop living in fear and actually create the life you want for yourself.
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Join our weekly text inspiration list by texting PODCAST to 832-219-7815 Join The Recovery School 2.0 to unlearn symptoms of love addiction and love avoidance Apply to work together in From Avoidant to Available Create balance and love in your life with The Loved Woman Planner
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#120: Why Your Deep Intimacy & Trust Should be Earned
Opening up and building trust to others is super important. But also so is being discriminate with who you allow into your heart.
In this episode, I talk about why this is important.
RESOURCES MENTIONED
Join our weekly text inspiration list by texting PODCAST to 832-219-7815 Join The Recovery School 2.0 to unlearn symptoms of love addiction and love avoidance Apply to work together in From Avoidant to Available Create balance and love in your life with The Loved Woman Planner
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#119: When You Realize You Were the Toxic One
What do you do when you realize you were the toxic one in a relationship? Let's talk about what it can look like here and also some steps for you to take.
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RESOURCES MENTIONED
Join our weekly text inspiration list by texting PODCAST to 832-219-7815 Join The Recovery School 2.0 to unlearn symptoms of love addiction and love avoidance Apply to work together in From Avoidant to Available Create balance and love in your life with The Loved Woman Planner
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#118: 3 Things I Learned from The Healed and Loved Woman Retreat (About Fear and Hiding)
In this episode, I recap the things I learned from the Healed and Loved Woman Retreat about fear, hiding, and the importance of sisterhood.
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Join our weekly text inspiration list by texting PODCAST to 832-219-7815 Get our free download - The 5 Step Roadmap to Heal Love Addiction Apply to work together in From Avoidant to Available Learn that YOU ARE WORTHY - Enroll in You Are Worthy here Create balance and love in your life with The Loved Woman Planner
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#117: How to Host a Relationship Check-In
In this episode, we talk about how to host a relationship check in with your family, friendship, and romantic partnerships. Grab a pen and paper to get started!
Purchase your Loved Woman Co Planner & Tools here
RESOURCES MENTIONED
Join our weekly text inspiration list by texting PODCAST to 832-219-7815 Get our free download - The 5 Step Roadmap to Heal Love Addiction Apply to work together in From Avoidant to Available Learn that YOU ARE WORTHY - Enroll in You Are Worthy here Create balance and love in your life with The Loved Woman Planner
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Instagram: @BlackGirlsHeal
Facebook: Black Girls Heal
Website: Blackgirlsheal.org
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Privacy & Opt-Out: https://redcircle.com/privacy
Link to episode
#116: Coping When Family and Loved Ones Think Negatively of You
RESOURCES MENTIONED
Join our weekly text inspiration list by texting PODCAST to 832-219-7815 Get our free download - The 5 Step Roadmap to Heal Love Addiction Apply to work together in From Avoidant to Available Learn that YOU ARE WORTHY - Enroll in You Are Worthy here Create balance and love in your life with The Loved Woman Planner
CONNECT WITH US ELSEWHERE
Instagram: @BlackGirlsHeal
Facebook: Black Girls Heal
Website: Blackgirlsheal.org
Advertising Inquiries: https://redcircle.com/brands
Privacy & Opt-Out: https://redcircle.com/privacy
Link to episode