"One can never give a child enough supports"

Join the gang with week while we break down the 2007 The Orphanage.  This movie has everything.  A mom who's basically a goth Peter Pan, searching high and low for her missing crew of lost boys.  There's this creepy cave that's basically a magnet for every kid with a death wish. And let's not forget about the little one with a life story so tragic, Shakespeare's tragedies are shaking. Buckle up, because this episode will take you on a roller coaster ride through every emotion you wish you didn't know you had.

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Up Next: Terrified (2017)

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"A Shaman, a Buddhist Monk, and a Priest walk into a bar"

Join the gang this week while we break down a pretty stellar foreign film. This one it a supernatural whodunit pitting two shamans against each other with a bumbling cop in the middle.  But are foes truly foes? No man knows. But by the end of the episode. We spoil it for you. So watch this one first maybe. It's great. you'll like it!

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Up Next: The Orphanage (2007)

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?There's no point in praying.?

Join the gang this week while we venture into a post-religious world. Where the only thing that can save you from evil it to not witness it. Unless you are immune. Then you can clean up evil with a sextant telescope thing. This is a crazy scary movie that got Paige just as much as Todd. Mikey wasn't at ALL affected.

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Up Next: The Wailing (2016)

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"We Are Our Own Worst Enemy."

Join the gang this week while we revisit Us.  Do we love the metaphor of this movie?  Absolutely.  Does the logic on the world the movie takes place in make sense? Not at all.  But what is so logical could unregulated capitalism pitting Us against ourselves for our very survival?  Peele knows how to make a movie!  We hope you enjoy this revisit of Us!

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Up Next: When Evil Lurks (2023)

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"You send a ghost to a pimp?"

Join the gang this week while we dive into The Glen to unpack a wonderful movie that pokes fun at some truly terrible realities in our world.  There is some debate as to if this movie is considered "Horror" so we'd love to know what you all think about that, but either way, the movie is amazingly done and Jamie, John, and Teyonah are amazing in it. Enjoy!

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Up Next: Us (2019)

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"We can't all Pod First"

Join the gang (and special guest Shondalia White) to break down this super funny horror comedy. Would we have survived the most racist board game ever? Probably not. but the one thing we are sure of is that Officer White and Mikey have extremely similar energy. Enjoy the episode!

If you want more of Shondalia White follow her on Instagram @storytimewithshondalia

Check out her Podcast:

I Can't Eat Sh*t! Podcast

https://www.youtube.com/user/ShondaliaWhite

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Up Next: They Cloned Tyrone (2023)

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"Roe V. Blade"

Join the gang this week while we break down the insane vampire sequel Blade 2.  This movie has everything.  Hellboy, a Boondock Saint, and a retconned main character who can't make up his mind if he is evil or not.  It also has Wesley Snipes at like PEEK Snipes.  It's amazing.  We hope you enjoy it.

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Up Next: The Blackening (2023)

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"Scream your last breath."

This is no tourist trap. It?s a new podcast episode. No one?s ever been down here before. Join the HV Crew as we repel into blood puddles, try to avoid creepy crawlies, and love each day with the Descent. Will Mikey blame Todd for sneaking up behind him and letting Mikey kill him with an axe?  Yeah Probably.  Enjoy.

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Up Next: Blade II (2002)

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"Cry little podcast!"

Join the gang this week while they revisit (with Mikey and Paige this time) The Lost Boys!!!  This is the first movie Todd has ever had the chance to pick and he pulled out one of our favorites.  We hope you enjoy this revisited episode!

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Up Next: The Descent (Revisited - 2006)

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"Hell is a teenage pod"

We?re actually evil. Not podcast evil. Grab your bag of frozen peas, your $12 corsage, and your BFF necklace, and meet us down at Melody Lane for Jennifer?s Body. It's Paige's first time on the podcast talking about this movie, so unlike Mikey and Todd's stale takes, hers are fresh out the garden!

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Up Next: Jennifer's Body (Revisited - 2009)

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"It's like Danny Ocean and Jigsaw went head to head"

Join the gang this week while we break down Mikey's favorite torture porn movie from the mid-2000s.  We had a lot of fun talking about this movie but that doesn't mean we all liked it.  I guess you'll have to listen to find out who loves it, who likes it, and who does NOT care for this movie at all.  The results may surprise you.

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Up Next: Jennifer's Body (Revisited - 2009)

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"More people get slapped in this movie than in loony tunes cartoons"

Join the gang this week as we dive back into the Stephen King classic Carrie.  This is technically a revisited episode but Mikey and Paige were not on the OG episode so their "takes" are Fresh and on point.  You are gonna enjoy this episode. It's one of Stephen King's best movie adaptations, and we had a great time talking about it.

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Up Next: The Collector (Revisited - 2009)

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"Life finds a way"

Merry Christmas!!!!  It's that magic time of the month of a magical time of year when not only do the listeners get to pick the listener request.  They can pick ANY movie they want, regardless of theme.  And this year the listeners picked Jurassic Park!  This movie RIPS and is of course a classic movie that blew people away in 1993 and us again when we watched it for the episode.  Please enjoy this Christmas edition of The Horror Virgin!

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Up Next: Carrie (Revisited - 1976)

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"Every time a bell rings an angel gets to kill."

Join the gang this week while we break down the better version of "It's a Wonderful Life.  Because the Potter Characters actually get what is coming to them.  Look.  Is this movie a work of art?  No.  not at all.  But is it so much fun it is absolutely going to be a "Go to" Christmas Horror Movie each year?  Hell yes!

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Up Next: Jurassic Park (1993)

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Happy 300th Episode!!!

Join the laughter-packed celebration of The Horror Virgin's 300th episode as the crew unravels the enigmatic Hitchcock classic, Psycho (1960). Tune in for the comedic breakdown, fun insights, and a heartfelt thank you to our incredible listeners. This milestone wouldn't be possible without your support and enthusiastic word-of-mouth. So, let's embark on a cinematic journey together, minus the screams, and share the joy of horror with gratitude!

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Up Next: It's a Wonderful Knife (2023)

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"What is happening?"

Step into the chaos with the crew and our awesome guest, Jason Pargin, as we unravel the mysteries of a mind-bending movie. We boldly venture into this cinematic experience with zero knowledge of the video game lore ? because, let's face it, we're here to review the movie, not the games. Brace yourselves for a wild ride through confusion as we try to make sense of everything that unfolds. Despite the perplexity, one thing is crystal clear ? we totally get why this flick raked in the big bucks at the box office!

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Up Next: Psycho (1960)

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"Welcome to Barrow (Alaska), Inhabitants: 3"

Join the gang this week while we revisit a town that goes zero sunlight for 30 days.  Will Todd go mad with Seasonal effectiveness disorder?   Will Paige try to bang Snow Crixus?  Will Mikey finally get to cut a child's head off with a dull axe?  Find out now while we Revisit 30 Days of Night!!!

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Up Next: Five Nights at Freddy's (2023)

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"The year is 1766... The hunt for a killer has begun"

Join the gang this week while we break down a Werewolf movie so wild there isn't even a Werewolf movie in it and we didn't care AT ALL.  This movie has everything, a French Fuckboi, Literally the best thing to ever come out of the American continent, and the Pope's Sexercist.  What's not to love?  

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Up Next: 30 Days of Night (2007)

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"Love Never Dies"

Dive into this week's episode as the gang delves into the quirkiest Dracula movie to date. Is Gary Oldman's portrayal of Dracula downright eccentric? Does Keanu Reeves deliver his most compelling performance yet? Mikey and Todd may just overuse the term "Bram Stoker's Dracula." Spoiler alert: they absolutely do. Don't miss out on the fun ? tune in and enjoy the banter!

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Up Next: Brotherhood of The Wolf (2001)

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"A Bitch of a Werewolf Movie"

Join the gang this week while we go to the woods of Scotland for a special training mission.  Will Todd wash out of the special forces program for not being able to kill a dog?  Will Paige we mesmerized by the Werewolves' large shoulders?  Will Mikey find a way to justify shooting his dog?  Find out now.

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Up Next: Bram Stoker's Dracula (1992)

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"Ten Years Ago he changed the face Of Halloween, now he's back."

Join the gang this week while we head back to Haddonfield, Illinois because Michael Myers is on the loose.  This time he is on the hunt for Jamie (Laurie's Daughter).  Why is he hunting her?  No idea.  We aren't sure it's important.  But Dr. Loomis is putting off renegade cop vibes in this movie and we are here for it!

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Up Next: Dog Soldiers (2003)

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"The Honeymoon's Gonna Be Killer."

Join the gang this week while we break down a move that we could have also done on Romancing the POd.  Cause at the core of this movie, it's about a guy meeting someone with similar interests and falling in love with them, then getting married and having a baby.  It just so happens that they are dolls and the interest they share is murder.  

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Up Next: Halloween 4: The Return of Michael Myers (1988)

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"Oh, yes. There will be blood."

Join the gang this week while we dip our severed toe back into the Saw franchise.  This time there is clearly a bigger budget and more action.  But is the action real or is it just a video playback?  I guess you'll have to find out on this breakdown of Saw 2.

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Up Next: Bride of Chucky (1998)

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"The city that has seen it all ain't seen nothing yet... If we ever get there!"

Join the gang this week, and Nationally recognized Friday the 13th expert (and Bar Owner... maybe) Jonathan Watkins, while they all break down a movie that can't even deliver on the title... but is somehow amazingly fun.  Do we think this is a good movie?  No.  Did we have a blast talking about it?  Hell Yeah!

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Up Next: Saw 2 (2005)

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"It's A Boy!"

Join the gang this week while we jump back into a crazy franchise that is just the best!  In this installment, we get to see Freddy as a baby.  And what is better than that?  This movie and episode are pretty insane but we like them that way.  

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Up Next: Saw 2 (2005)

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"A movie that refuses to make sense"

Join us this week as we dive deep into the confusingly titled 5th installment of the Scream franchise, aptly named "Scream." Opinions are divided, with one of us loving it and two others not so much. It might not be the best Scream movie, but we had an absolute blast dissecting it and sharing our thoughts. Tune in for a lively discussion!

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Up Next: Nightmare on Elm Street 5: The Dream Child (1989)

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"I haven't been ignoring your pod... I've been busy"

Join us this week while we break down the listener request winner Talk to Me.  This movie surprised us with how good it is.  We really dig in on what the movie is saying about addiction and disassociation, but we also have a lot of fun too.  We hope you enjoy this one.

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Up Next: 5cream (2022)

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"The Bark and the Wicked"

Join us this week while we break down one of the saddest movies we have done in a while.  This movie is great and scary.  So scary in fact we divert our attention away from the sadness by becoming investigative journalists and uncovering a possible scam.  It's a heavy but very fun episode.  Enjoy!

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Up Next: Talk to Me (2023)

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"A scary movie so bad it couldn't even scare Todd"

Have you ever wanted to see a movie that started off pretty decent but ended up feeling like a huge disappointment?  Well, Temple is the movie for you. It sets up so many things the never pay off and honestly ends up being kinda boring because of it.  But we had a GREAT time breaking it down.  Enjoy.

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Up Next: The Dark and the Wicked (2020)

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"My nightmare is they won't make any more of these movies"

Join the gang this week while we venture to Spain to try and sell our dead father's family abbey.  Will Father Mikey ask for forgiveness for loving down a lady? Will Paige convince Father Crowe to exorcist the demon outta Todd so we can sell this damn place?  Find out now!

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Up Next: The Pope's Exorcist (2023)

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"The most feared predator in history...is no longer history."

Join the gang this week while we break down this truly insane creature feature.  Will Todd geek out over the truly unbelievable science in this movie?  Will Paige find any way she can to mention that tentacles are sexy? Will Mikey explain the nuances of a "Mikey Movie"? find out now!

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Up Next: The Pope's Exorcist (2023)

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"This ain't no pleasure cruise."

Join the gang this week while we break down a movie so bonkers you will swear it was written in the 80s on cocaine.  But it was made in the late 90s and this movie has EVERYTHING!  A cruise ship owner that wants to sink his boat for the insurance, a mercenary captain looking for love in the South China Sea,  a lady cat burglar who might also be looking for a Treat if ya know what I mean.  Oh yeah and also the SEA MONSTER THAT ATTACKS THEM!!!  This movie is perfect and the episode is bonkers.  Enjoy!!!

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Up Next: The Meg (2018)

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"Aliens thrilled you... The Thing shocked you... Now experience real fear..."

Join the gang this week while we travel 3 miles below the ocean to mine silver... for some reason.  Will Mikey find True love while sharing a flask of vodka?  Will Todd convince his fellow sea miners to unionize? Will Paige find any to be the only woman alive with young Robocop at the end?  find out now!

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Up Next: Deep Rising (1998)

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"This time... It's personal."

Join the gang this week while we travel from Amity to the Bahamas to get away from all these sharks.  Cause sharks don't like to swim in warm water.  So we will be safe in the Bahamas, right?  Like it would be INSANE for one shark to travel from Amity to the Bahamas just for revenge right?  I hope that isn't what this movie is about.

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Up Next: Leviathan (1989)

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"Life and Death are Meaningless...And Pain Is God."

Join the gang this week while we break down our first-ever Rob Zombie film.  We had a LOT of fun in this episode.  did we enjoy the movie?... Kinda.  You'll have to listen to find out.

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Up Next: Jaws: The Revenge (1987)

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"There's Roadkill All Over Texas"

Join the gang while we break down the 3rd installment of the TCM franchise.  This movie is not good.  But this movie almost has it all.  Aragorn? Check.  Ken Foree? Check.  A huge saw that looks too expensive to be used for cutting up people? Check. Enjoy this fun episode.

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Up Next: House of 1000 Corpses (2003)

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"The bayou has its own law... and they just broke it."

Join the gang this week while we continue our southern slashers series with our breakdown of Southern Comfort. This movie seems a little ahead of its time but as we find out throughout the episode, the director didn't AT ALL mean it to be. Enjoy the episode!

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Up Next: Leatherface: Texas Chainsaw Massacre 3 (1990)

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"It's the last one you'll ever take."

Join the gang this week while we venture into the deep south.  Will our gang make it through the backwoods of the deep south, or will they make a WRONG TURN!!!!!! Find out now.

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Up Next: Southern Comfort (1981)

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"You'll never guess who's been down this river"

Join the gang while we break down one of the most Iconic horror films on the 1970's. Will Paige confirm that she is too "indoorsy" for this movie? Will Mikey Talk a LOT about his experiences on this river?  Will Todd struggle to come up with a third thing to list while writing an episode blurb?  Find out now!

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Up Next: Wrong Turn (2003)

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"Fear Changes Everything"

Join the gang (Mikey's back!!!) while we break down this extremely sad Stephen King adaptation.  Will Mikey regale us with tales from his vacation to the beach?  Will Todd and Paige sing WAY more than any podcast host should be allowed?  Find out now!

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Up Next: Deliverance (1972)

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"Sometimes dead is better."

Join Paige, Todd, and Special Guest Julian Fernandez had a blast breaking down this amazing movie. Will Paige fall in love with Church? Will Todd enjoy being forced to watch a movie where a truck kills someone AND a pet dies? Will Jules bring some amazing insight and impressions? Find out now.

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Up Next: The Mist (2007)

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"The Most Fun You'll Ever Have BEING SCARED!"

Join the gang for this truly unhinged episode on Creepshow. I don't know if it was because we recorded this later at night, or if it's cause the movie is bonkers, or if it's because Paige had just gotten back from Japan. but this episode is nuts. you all are gonna love it.

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Up Next: Pet Sematary (1989)

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"This Christmas there will be no peace on Earth."

Join the gang, and Special Guest Jeff May while we break down one of his favorite horror movies. Will Jeff convince Mikey that AvPR is amazing, or will Mikey stand fine on his hate of this installment of the AvP franchise? Find out now.

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Up Next: Creepshow (1982)

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"Stephen King's masterpiece of terror directed by the master himself."

Join the gang while we jump into a movie so crazy some of us weren't even sure what happened at the end of this movie.  We had a lot of fun with this truly bonkers movie and we hope you have fun with this extremely bonkers episode.

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Up Next: Aliens vs Predator - Requiem (2007)

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"Mommy's with the maggots now"

Join the gang while we dig deep into Evil Dead Rise. We could think of no better way to celebrate mothers day than recording an episode on Evil Dead Rise. We honestly loved this movie. Even Todd. Even though he hopes he will never see it again.

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Up Next: Maximum Overdrive (1986)

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"I'm going to give you the choice I never had."

Join the Gang while we dig into Anne Rice's best adaptation with friend of the pod Jon Risinger. We have a lot of fun with this episode talking about all the things we absolutely missed the first time we saw this movie as children.

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Up Next: Evil Dead Rise (2023)

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"They will tear your soul apart. Again."

Join the gang while they venture back into an 8th graders angsty screenplay to see how we feel about the 2nd film in the Hellraiser franchise. Will Todd hate this one as much as he did the first? Find out now!

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Up Next: Interview with the Vampire (1994)

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"After ten years... the ball is back!"

Join the gang while we head back into the bonkers world of Phantasm after all these years? Do we try to break this movie down logically? No. How could we. But we do have loads of fun walking you through this insane sequel. Enjoy!

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Up Next: Hellbound: Hellraiser II (1988)

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"A movie about class where the rich fight the rich and the poor only survive because the rich allow it"

Join the gang in this extra long episode about a movie that some people love and some people hate and both are right. All we know is that there is no way we'd make it out alive.

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Up Next: Phantasm 2 (1988)

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"It's like if Todd was stuck in a haunted house"

A disgraced internet personality attempts to win back his followers by livestreaming one night alone in a haunted house. But when he accidentally pisses off a vengeful spirit, his big comeback event becomes a real-time fight for his life. Will Todd... I am Shawn make it through the night in one piece? Find out now.

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Up Next: The Menu (2022)

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