Attachment repair is a skill, not just insight.

Swedish clinical psychologist and SecureBase Lab founder Martin Jonsson explores how attachment healing extends beyond individual therapy and into relationships and community. Martin shares how peer support, shared experiences, and practical secure-relating skills can create opportunities for attachment repair, while exploring the roles of spirituality, sexuality, and belonging in building deeper, more secure connections.

“Community is about horizontal empathy, not hierarchy.” – Martin Jonsson Attachment Isn’t Solo Work: Healing Through Community with Martin Jonsson (310)

02:21 Spirituality and its role in therapy
09:21 Community as a space for attachment repair
11:23 Difference between groups and communities
14:54 Horizontal empathy and attachment in community
19:56 The integration of attachment theory in recovery models
22:26 Peer support and corrective emotional experiences
25:52 Language of attachment and shared understanding
28:27 Accessibility and inclusivity in attachment work
30:44 Sexuality and attachment patterns
34:09 Impact of attachment on intimacy and boundaries
40:44 Working with unconscious shadow aspects in community
45:16 The role of mentalization and affect regulation
49:38 Resources and upcoming workshops

About our Guest – Martin Jonsson 

Martin Jonsson is a licensed clinical psychologist, educator, and founder of Secure Base Lab, an attachment-informed therapeutic community integrating attachment science, experiential psychotherapy, and relational approaches to support psychological growth and relational wellbeing. For more than twenty years, Martin has worked at the intersection of psychotherapy, education, and transformational learning. Alongside his clinical practice, he has facilitated groups, trained professionals, and designed experiential learning programs across healthcare, education, social services, and personal growth. His academic training includes degrees in Clinical Psychology and Sexology, complemented by extensive postgraduate training in attachment-based therapies, including experiential dynamic therapies, as well as supervision training. His work is further informed by contemporary attachment research, affective neuroscience, interpersonal neurobiology, and experiential psychotherapy. Today, Martin combines clinical practice, teaching, writing, and facilitation with the ongoing development of Secure Base Lab. His work is dedicated to bridging rigorous psychological science with the timeless human need for belonging, helping people move beyond understanding themselves
toward experiencing—and creating—the kinds of relationships in which lasting change becomes possible. Click Here to see Martin’s full bio. 

Resources for Attachment Isn’t Solo Work: Healing Through Community with Martin Jonsson (310)

The Secure Base Lab – Website, resources, workshops and more

@TheSecureBaseLab – Official Instagram page

Please support our sponsors – they keep our podcast free and accessible to all! 

SimplePractice is an all-in-one EHR that is HIPPA compliant, HITRUST certified and built specifically for therapists.

If you are ready to simplify the business side of your practice, now is a great time to try SimplePractice. Start with a 7-day free trial, then get 50% off your first three months. Just go to SimplePractice.com to claim the offer.

Beyond Attachment Styles – Deepening Security in Yourself and Fostering More Secure Relationships Course available NOW!  LIVE Q&A SEPTEMBER 25TH!

Everyone’s heard of attachment styles – but you likely don’t know how much the popular press gets wrong and what the science actually says about how to improve your relationships long term (including how we relate to ourselves).  This course is for anyone wanting to more deeply understand attachment (styles vs patterns), unconscious defense activation patterns, implicit scripts… and most importantly, what to do once you do get activated!  Online, Self-Paced, Asynchronous Learning with Quarterly Live Q&A’s! Earn 6 Continuing Education Credits – Available at Checkout.

As a listener of this podcast, use code BAS15 for a limited-time discount.

Or read Marriott & Kelley’s critically-acclaimed book, Secure Relating: Holding Your Own in an Insecure World (HarperCollins,2023) for the most in-depth experience of learning about Secure Relating.

Therapists love it, but it’s accessible to everyone.  If you aren’t interested in the background science, just start at Part 2 and we will be talking directly to you – it’s fun!

You are invited!  OK for those of you who refer others to the pod, use it professionally or consider yourself nerdy and just love this stuff, hello, you are our people!

Join our exclusive community to get exclusive bonus content, early access to training opportunities, and an ad-free, private podcast feed. It’s this warm community that allows us to donate half of all corportate profits to mental health access for marginalized peoples.  Sign up for our premium Neuronerd plan!! Click here!! 

What can DBT teach us about turning invalidation into joy?

Dr. Kiki Fehling and Dr. Ann Kelley explore how chronic invalidation can shape emotional regulation, identity, and self-worth, particularly for queer and trans individuals. Through the lens of DBT and minority stress, Kiki shares how understanding these experiences can help challenge internalized shame, build resilience, and move beyond simply healing – and make space for authenticity, connection, and queer joy.

“Internalized shame can be healed through community.” – Dr. Kiki Fehling Time Stamps for DBT, Chronic Invalidation & Finding Queer Joy with Dr. Kiki Fehling (309)

00:27 Understanding chronic invalidation in parenting and garegiving
02:05 How invalidations lead to emotional dysregulation
04:37 Adult consequences of childhood invalidations
07:00 Invalidation beyond parenting: Queer identity and society
07:59 Minority stress and queer invalidations
14:51 Using DBT to cultivate joy and self-acceptance
23:06 Practical tools: Books and resources for self-directed DBT

About our Guest – Dr. Kiki Fehling

Dr. Kiki Fehling (they/she) is a licensed psychologist, author, speaker, and DBT-Linehan-Board-certified expert in Dialectical Behavior Therapy (DBT). Passionate about making evidence-based mental health information more accessible, Kiki focuses on advocacy and public education around suicide prevention, LGBTQIA+ mental health, borderline personality disorder, and the intersection between mental health and heart health. She is the author of The LGBTQ+ Mental Health Workbook, Self-Directed DBT Skills, and DBT Cards for Coping Skills. Kiki also writes the Substack newsletter How To Queer Joy, volunteers for nonprofits Now Matters Now and WomenHeart, and shares DBT skills and mental health resources across social media @dbtkiki. 

 

Resources for DBT, Chronic Invalidation & Finding Queer Joy with Dr. Kiki Fehling (309) The LGBTQ+ Mental Health Workbook – Find Emotional Resilience, Self-Love, and Queer Joy with Dialectical Behavior Therapy Self-Directed DBT Skills – 3-Month DBT Workbook Dr. Kiki Fehling’s website – Additional resources and information @DBTKiKi – Official Instagram page @DBTKIKI – Official Tiktok page DBTKIKI – Official Youtube channel How To Queer Joy – Official Substack Please support our sponsors – they keep our podcast free and accessible to all! 

SimplePractice is an all-in-one EHR that is HIPPA compliant, HITRUST certified and built specifically for therapists.

If you are ready to simplify the business side of your practice, now is a great time to try SimplePractice. Start with a 7-day free trial, then get 50% off your first three months. Just go to SimplePractice.com to claim the offer.

Beyond Attachment Styles – Deepening Security in Yourself and Fostering More Secure Relationships Course available NOW!  

Everyone’s heard of attachment styles – but you likely don’t know how much the popular press gets wrong and what the science actually says about how to improve your relationships long term (including how we relate to ourselves).  This course is for anyone wanting to more deeply understand attachment (styles vs patterns), unconscious defense activation patterns, implicit scripts… and most importantly, what to do once you do get activated!  Online, Self-Paced, Asynchronous Learning with Quarterly Live Q&A’s! Earn 6 Continuing Education Credits – Available at Checkout.

As a listener of this podcast, use code BAS15 for a limited-time discount.

Or read Marriott & Kelley’s critically-acclaimed book, Secure Relating: Holding Your Own in an Insecure World (HarperCollins,2023)

for the most in-depth experience of learning about Secure Relating.

Therapists love it, but it’s accessible to everyone.  If you aren’t interested in the background science, just start at Part 2 and we will be talking directly to you – it’s fun!

 

You are invited!  OK for those of you who refer others to the pod, use it professionally or consider yourself nerdy and just love this stuff, hello, you are our people! Join our exclusive community to get exclusive bonus content, early access to training opportunities, and an ad-free, private podcast feed. It’s this warm community that allows us to donate half of all corportate profits to mental health access for marginalized peoples.  Sign up for our premium Neuronerd plan!! Click here!! 

Patreon/Supercast Special Release – Bonus – Inside Mentalization-Based Treatment: Borderline & Narcissistic Personality Disorders (308) This is a sneak peek of our 2nd episode with Robert Drozek – available only on our Premium Supercast and Patreon platforms. For as little as $5/month you can have access to special releases like this one, first-to-know about upcoming events and discounts and an ad-free feed. Click here to join & finish the episode!! What is mentalization—and how can therapists put it into practice?

In this more clinical deep dive, Robert Drozek explores Mentalization-Based Treatment (MBT) and how strengthening our ability to understand our own and others’ inner experiences can support the treatment of borderline and narcissistic personality disorders. Sue and Robert explore the common breakdowns in mentalizing, the power of curiosity over certainty, and practical strategies clinicians can use to help clients build greater emotional awareness, empathy, and connection.

“The hallmark of mentalization is curiosity.” – Robert Drozek Time Stamps for Bonus – Inside Mentalization-Based Treatment: Borderline & Narcissistic Personality Disorders (308)

01:20 – What is Mentalization?
02:56 – The origins of Mentalization-Based Treatment (MBT)
08:07 – Curiosity vs. certainty: What healthy mentalizing looks like
12:43 – When thoughts feel like facts: Psychic equivalence
18:14 – Certainty in Borderline Personality Disorder
19:34 – Certainty in Narcissism
20:58 – The “not-knowing” stance in MBT
26:00 – How Mentalization-Based treatment actually works
32:32 – MBT vs. DBT: What’s the difference?
35:11 – How therapists can incorporate Mentalization into practice
42:25 – Identifying Mentalizing blind spots

About our Guest – Robert P. Drozek, LICSW

Robert P. Drozek, LICSW is the clinical director of the Mentalization-Based Treatment Clinic at McLean Hospital in Belmont, Massachusetts. He is a teaching associate in the Department of Psychiatry at Harvard Medical School, specializing in the treatment of
borderline personality disorder, narcissistic personality disorder, and post-traumatic stress disorder. He is author of the new book, Mentalization: Utilizing reflection to heal from borderline personality disorder—the first book for the general public about
mentalization-based treatment.

 

Resources for Bonus – Inside Mentalization-Based Treatment: Borderline & Narcissistic Personality Disorders (308)

Download page – Free worksheets and handouts from the book

Mentalization Coach App – The first mobile app for mentalization and MBT,
adapted from my new book

Mentalization-based Treatment for Pathological Narcissism – Handbook

Mentalization-based Treatment for Personality Disorders –  A practical guide

Cambridge Guide to Mentalization-based Treatment

Anna Freud Centre – The worldwide training hub for mentalization-based
treatment (MBT)

NPD Basic – A free guide to narcissistic personality disorder

MBT Boston – An organization that Robert co-founded that offers training and supervision to clinicians across the world in MBT

MBT USA – A consortium of MBT providers and organizations in the United

Robert’s faculty page at McLean Hospital

Instagram: @RobertDrozek

Mentalization book – Facebook page

Get your copy of Mentalization: Utilizing Reflection to Heal from Borderline Personality Disorder here!

 

 

Looking for our Upcoming Events? Click here!! Our Beyond Attachment Styles course is available NOW!

Learn how your nervous system, your mind, and your relationships work together in a fascinating dance, shaping who you are and how you connect with others.

Earn 6 Continuing Education Credits – Available at Checkout Online, Self-Paced, Asynchronous Learning with Quarterly Live Q&A’s – Next Q&A Coming September 2026!

Borderline and narcissism are often misunderstood—this episode separates myth from science.

Robert Drozek explores the science behind borderline and narcissistic personality disorders, separating common myths from current research. Together, he and Sue discuss attachment, trauma, genetics, parenting, evidence-based treatments, and why understanding these often misunderstood conditions can bring greater compassion, hope, and healthier relationships.

“Borderline is driven by a need to reconnect.” – Robert P. Drozek, LICSW Time Stamps for Challenging Personalities: Understanding Borderline & Narcissism with Robert Drozek (307)

04:14 Understanding Borderline Personality Disorder
09:25 Exploring narcissism: Definitions and types
13:29 Vulnerable vs. grandiose narcissism
18:56 The Role of Trauma in Personality Disorders
22:25 Parenting styles and their impact on narcissism
27:14 Identifying narcissism in relationships
33:34 Treatment approaches for Borderline Personality Disorder
36:45 Challenges in treating Narcissistic Personality Disorder
45:26 Navigating relationships with narcissistic individuals

About our Guest – Robert P. Drozek, LICSW

Robert P. Drozek, LICSW is the clinical director of the Mentalization-Based Treatment Clinic at McLean Hospital in Belmont, Massachusetts. He is a teaching associate in the Department of Psychiatry at Harvard Medical School, specializing in the treatment of
borderline personality disorder, narcissistic personality disorder, and post-traumatic stress disorder. He is author of the new book, Mentalization: Utilizing reflection to heal from borderline personality disorder—the first book for the general public about
mentalization-based treatment.

 

Resources for Challenging Personalities: Understanding Borderline & Narcissism with Robert Drozek (307)

Download page – Free worksheets and handouts from the book

Mentalization Coach App – The first mobile app for mentalization and MBT,
adapted from my new book

Mentalization-based Treatment for Pathological Narcissism – Handbook

Mentalization-based Treatment for Personality Disorders–  A practical guide

Cambridge Guide to Mentalization-based Treatment

Anna Freud Centre – The worldwide training hub for mentalization-based
treatment (MBT)

NPD Basic – A free guide to narcissistic personality disorder

MBT Boston – An organization that Robert co-founded that offers training and supervision to clinicians across the world in MBT

MBT USA – A consortium of MBT providers and organizations in the United

Robert’s faculty page at McLean Hospital

Instagram: @RobertDrozek

Mentalization book – Facebook page

Get your copy of Mentalization: Utilizing Reflection to Heal from Borderline Personality Disorder here! Please support our sponsors – they keep our podcast free and accessible to all! 

SimplePractice is an all-in-one EHR that is HIPPA compliant, HITRUST certified and built specifically for therapists.

If you are ready to simplify the business side of your practice, now is a great time to try SimplePractice. Start with a 7-day free trial, then get 50% off your first three months. Just go to SimplePractice.com to claim the offer.

Beyond Attachment Styles – Deepening Security in Yourself and Fostering More Secure Relationships Course available NOW!  

Everyone’s heard of attachment styles – but you likely don’t know how much the popular press gets wrong and what the science actually says about how to improve your relationships long term (including how we relate to ourselves).  This course is for anyone wanting to more deeply understand attachment (styles vs patterns), unconscious defense activation patterns, implicit scripts… and most importantly, what to do once you do get activated!  Online, Self-Paced, Asynchronous Learning with Quarterly Live Q&A’s! Earn 6 Continuing Education Credits – Available at Checkout.

As a listener of this podcast, use code BAS15 for a limited-time discount.

Or read Marriott & Kelley’s critically-acclaimed book, Secure Relating: Holding Your Own in an Insecure World (HarperCollins,2023)

for the most in-depth experience of learning about Secure Relating.

Therapists love it, but it’s accessible to everyone.  If you aren’t interested in the background science, just start at Part 2 and we will be talking directly to you – it’s fun!

 

You are invited!  OK for those of you who refer others to the pod, use it professionally or consider yourself nerdy and just love this stuff, hello, you are our people! Join our exclusive community to get exclusive bonus content, early access to training opportunities, and an ad-free, private podcast feed. It’s this warm community that allows us to donate half of all corportate profits to mental health access for marginalized peoples.  Sign up for our premium Neuronerd plan!! Click here!! 

What if your relationship struggles aren’t just personal—but shaped by the systems you live in?

Together, Akilah Riley Richardson and Sue Marriott challenge traditional Western therapy models, discuss the importance of “responsible externalizing,” and explore how therapists can create space for grief, imagination, and genuine connection instead of trying to fix what cannot simply be solved.

Akilah Riley Richardson returns to explore how systemic trauma quietly shapes our relationships, nervous systems, and sense of self. Drawing from her work with marginalized couples, she introduces the concept of relational privilege and explains why healing cannot be separated from the social systems we live in.

“The experiences of marginalized people are often devalued even by helping professionals, and this text is my dedication to carving a space where we, as practitioners, can ensure that we are of service in a way that is rooted in the realities of our people. It is also a reflection of my obligation to marginalized couples and individuals. My sincere wish for them all is that they are never harmed in therapy but instead uplifted. ” – Akilah Riley-Richardson Time Stamps for The Hidden Weight of Systemic Trauma: How Oppression Shapes Our Relationships with Akilah Riley-Richardson (306)

02:05 The systemic trauma faced by marginalized couples
04:12 Barriers for global south therapists and voices
08:00 Fear, threat, and navigating space as a marginalized person
09:57 Relational privilege and systemic influence
12:03 The role of colonial Christianity in systemic trauma
17:50 The danger of model dogmatism in therapy
20:06 Neurobiological threat and systemic trauma
22:02 Practicing responsible externalizing in therapy
26:07 The grief of systemic trauma and loss
28:04 The limitations of evidence-based models
29:58 The need for imagination and community in healing
31:47 The concept of lostness and liminality in trauma
34:06 The danger of attachment to models and frameworks
35:59 Differentiating systemic from relational reality
38:10 Yoruba and indigenous healing traditions
41:59 The influence of colonialism and imperialism on therapy
43:53 Acknowledge systemic trauma in therapist self-awareness
49:57 Habits of survival and internalized oppression
51:52 The impact of systemic trauma on body and mind

About our Guest – Akilah Riley-Richardson, MSW, CCTP

Akilah Riley-Richardson, MSW, CCTP is a dedicated therapist, educator, and researcher with several years of experience. As a Certified Clinical Trauma Professional and STAIR Method Certified clinician, Akilah specializes in relational healing, focusing on the needs of couples and individuals, both in the Caribbean and internationally.Her expertise extends to supporting sexual and racial minorities, ensuring that her practice is inclusive and culturally sensitive. Akilah’s commitment to education and advocacy has led her to consult for esteemed organizations, including NASTAD, I-TECH, CARPHA, and CVC, where she has made significant contributions to healthcare training and community support. She has presented her work at various prestigious forums, such as the Psychotherapy Networker Symposium, Academy of Therapy Wisdom, Harvard Medical School, Chicago School of Psychology and the Black Mental Health Symposium. From 2012 to 2025, she served as a Social Work Educator at the University of the Southern Caribbean, mentoring future leaders in the field. Currently, she serves as a Research Supervisor and Examiner at the University of the West Indies Global Campus. As the founder of the Relational Healing Institute and the creator of the P.R.I.D.E. model, Akilah is passionate about advancing relational therapies. Her book, “Marginalized Couples in Therapy” reflects this passion.

Resources for The Hidden Weight of Systemic Trauma: How Oppression Shapes Our Relationships with Akilah Riley-Richardson (306)

Marginalized Couples in Therapy: Interventions for Healing from Systemic Trauma – Akilah’s new book, use this link for 20% off. Get your copy today!

Akilah’s website  – Resources, opportunities and additional information

Please support our sponsors – they keep our podcast free and accessible to all! 

SimplePractice is an all-in-one EHR that is HIPPA compliant, HITRUST certified and built specifically for therapists.

If you are ready to simplify the business side of your practice, now is a great time to try SimplePractice. Start with a 7-day free trial, then get 50% off your first three months. Just go to SimplePractice.com to claim the offer.

Beyond Attachment Styles – Deepening Security in Yourself and Fostering More Secure Relationships Course available NOW!  

Everyone’s heard of attachment styles – but you likely don’t know how much the popular press gets wrong and what the science actually says about how to improve your relationships long term (including how we relate to ourselves).  This course is for anyone wanting to more deeply understand attachment (styles vs patterns), unconscious defense activation patterns, implicit scripts… and most importantly, what to do once you do get activated!  Online, Self-Paced, Asynchronous Learning with Quarterly Live Q&A’s! Earn 6 Continuing Education Credits – Available at Checkout.

As a listener of this podcast, use code BAS15 for a limited-time discount.

Or read Marriott & Kelley’s critically-acclaimed book, Secure Relating: Holding Your Own in an Insecure World (HarperCollins,2023)

for the most in-depth experience of learning about Secure Relating.

Therapists love it, but it’s accessible to everyone.  If you aren’t interested in the background science, just start at Part 2 and we will be talking directly to you – it’s fun!

 

You are invited!  OK for those of you who refer others to the pod, use it professionally or consider yourself nerdy and just love this stuff, hello, you are our people! Join our exclusive community to get exclusive bonus content, early access to training opportunities, and an ad-free, private podcast feed. It’s this warm community that allows us to donate half of all corportate profits to mental health access for marginalized peoples.  Sign up for our premium Neuronerd plan!! Click here!! 

The leadership skill that changes everything

Special guest Amy Holloway explores how trust shapes thriving communities, effective leadership, and long-term economic growth. Drawing from interviews with leaders across the United States, Amy shares the simple but powerful behaviors that build trust, strengthen collaboration, and create meaningful change – whether in organizations, neighborhoods, or entire cities. Together, Amy and Ann discuss the leadership traits that foster connection, the behaviors that erode trust, and why building community starts with intentional relationships.

“Trust-building is within everyone’s power.” – Amy Holloway Time Stamps for Trust Builders: Leadership That Creates Change with Amy Holloway (305)

00:15 Importance of establishing trust in communities
07:32 Trust breakers vs. trust builders
14:18 Characteristics of effective community leaders
19:52 Insights from interviews with local leaders
25:33 Crisis management and community recovery

About our Guest – Amy Holloway, President of Aha!

Amy Holloway is the president of Aha!, an economic development consultancy specializing in strategic planning, and a practitioner-in-residence with Harvard Kennedy School’s Reimagining the Economy Project. Over a 30-year career, she has helped more than 200 places design strategies for long-term economic growth and community prosperity. A retired partner at Ernst & Young and leader of the firms national economic development practice, Amy previously founded and led Avalanche Consulting, one of the nation’s leading strategic planning firms. With her upbeat, welcoming style, she brings local leaders together through conversations that spark “aha!” moments and shared action. Her new #1 bestselling book, Trust Builders: The Key To Thriving Communities, is the culmination of Amy’s career-long belief that trust among local leaders is the single most powerful force shaping thriving communities. Amy lives in Asheville, North Carolina. In her free time, she enjoys hiking, painting, and teaching Pilates.

Resources for Trust Builders: Leadership That Creates Change with Amy Holloway (305)

Trust Builders: The Key to Thriving Communities – Get your copy of Amy’s book today!!

Aha! Advisor – Aha! is where leaders unite to make a lasting impact, learn more

Trust Strengths Assessment – Take your assessment here!!

Reimagining the Economy Project, Harvard Kennedy School – Rohan Sandhu, Tony Ditta, Monserrat Magana Ocana

The Social Capital Atlas – Raj Chetty, Matthew O. Jackson, Theresa Kuchler, Johannes Stroebel. Abigail Hiller, Sarah Oppenheimer * The Opportunity Insights Team

Beyond Attachment Styles course is available NOW!  

Learn how your nervous system, your mind, and your relationships work together in a fascinating dance, shaping who you are and how you connect with others. Online, Self-Paced, Asynchronous Learning with Quarterly Live Q&A’s! Earn 6 Continuing Education Credits – Available at Checkout As a listener of this podcast, use code BAS15 for a limited-time discount.

 

 

Get your copy of Secure Relating here!!

The therapy conversation we don’t have enough.

Dr. Sabrina N’Diaye shares a holistic approach to healing that blends spirituality, therapy, ancestral wisdom, and community connection. Together, we explore the transformative power of writing, forgiveness, and intentional rituals, while discussing how self-love, collective healing, and honoring every emotion can help us reconnect with ourselves and move through trauma with greater compassion and resilience.

“Each day, I commit to loving myself more deeply than the day before. And I’m loving the journey.” – Dr. Sabrina N’Diaye Time Stamps for Healing Through Spirituality, Writing, and Connection with Dr. Sabrina N’Diaye (304)

02:37 The significance of spirituality in therapy
05:16 The power of writing and journaling
07:48 Exploring ancestral connections
10:36 Lessons from Big Mama
13:14 Forgiveness as a path to healing
18:37 The role of imagery in therapeutic practice
21:14 Connecting with ancestors and spiritual figures
33:49 Exploring Genograms for healing
36:52 The body as a resource in healing
38:49 Challenging patriarchy and racism in therapy
45:22 The importance of community healing
51:11 Creating circles of connection

About our Guest – Dr. Sabrina N’Diaye 

Dr. Sabrina N’Diaye is a pioneering thought leader in integrating spirituality with psychotherapy. As an integrative therapist, storyteller, and peacebuilder, she blends ancient spiritual practices with the latest scientific research and wisdom to guide others on their healing journeys. She holds a PhD in Mind-Body Medicine from Saybrook University, where her research focused on the use of guided imagery as a healing tool for African-American women with chronic STIs. She is also the founder of The Heart Nest Center for Peace and Healing, where she lovingly serves women, couples, and small groups. A passionate storyteller, Dr. Sabrina is a strong advocate for the power of narrative in the healing process. She believes that sharing stories is a powerful tool for connecting with others and fostering community healing. This belief is central to her workshops and public speaking engagements, where she encourages participants to explore and share their own stories as pathways to personal and collective healing. Sabrina has taught trauma healing and self-care to healthcare professionals and community leaders around the globe, and spent 13 years as a Lead Clinician for community-wide trauma programs in the Middle East, Africa, Central Asia, and all over the U.S. In 2022, she co-launched Embracing Buffalo, a project specifically designed to address the aftermath of the May 14th massacre of African-Americans in East Buffalo. Dr. Sabrina is a highly-respected member of the treatment community, frequently lecturing on topics such as peacebuilding, spirituality, self-care for healers, imagery, writing, and the transformative power of connection. Her many audiences include police departments, correctional facilities, school systems, flight attendants, healing artists, peacebuilders, and aspiring writers. Her first book, Big Mama Speaks: Love Lessons from a Harlem River Swan, draws on her maternal grandmother’s resilience in overcoming trauma and chronic illness. Dr. Sabrina is deeply passionate about mentoring other therapists in creating fulfilling careers while serving humanity.

Resources for Healing Through Spirituality, Writing, and Connection with Dr. Sabrina N’Diaye (304)

The Heart Nest Institute – Additional resources, information, programs, group opportunities, and more

Big Mama Speaks: Love Lessons from a Harlem River Swan – Sabrina’s book, purchase your copy today!

Psychotherapy Networker – Articles and other content from Sabrina

Beyond Attachment Styles course is available NOW!  

Learn how your nervous system, your mind, and your relationships work together in a fascinating dance, shaping who you are and how you connect with others. Online, Self-Paced, Asynchronous Learning with Quarterly Live Q&A’s! Earn 6 Continuing Education Credits – Available at Checkout As a listener of this podcast, use code BAS15 for a limited-time discount.

 

 

 

You are invited!  Join our exclusive community to get early access and discounts to things we produce, plus an ad-free, private feed. In addition, receive exclusive episodes recorded just for you. Sign up for our premium Neuronerd plan!! Click here!! 

Get your copy of Secure Relating here!!

OCD isn’t just about managing symptoms—it’s about understanding the parts beneath them

In the third and final part of our OCD series, expert Melissa Mose explores the complexities of Obsessive-Compulsive Disorder (OCD), discussing evidence-based treatments like Exposure and Response Prevention (ERP) and how Internal Family Systems (IFS) therapy can complement traditional approaches. Drawing from both professional expertise and personal experience, Melissa shares practical strategies for navigating OCD, while highlighting the roles of self-leadership, compassion, and understanding the different “parts” that influence thoughts, fears, and behaviors.

“ERP has been shown to be the most effective treatment. Exposures help the brain rewire and learn resilience.” – Melissa Mose  Time Stamps for The Hidden Parts of OCD: ERP, IFS, and Self-Leadership with Melissa Mose (303)

00:12 Introduction to OCD and treatment
02:58 Understanding exposure and response prevention (ERP)
08:13 The role of the therapist in ERP
10:45 Integrating internal family systems (IFS) with ERP
13:30 The impact of shame in OCD
16:09 Differentiating reassurance from compulsions
36:25 Understanding exiled parts in therapy
40:58 Obsessive and compulsive parts: A closer look
43:38 Navigating the helicopter parent dynamic
47:40 Differentiating between anxiety and OCD
55:45 The connection between attachment and OCD

About our Guest – Melissa Mose, LMFT

Melissa Mose is a Licensed Marriage and Family Therapist with a private practice in Los Angeles since 1995. She has specialized in the treatment of OCD and anxiety since 2011 and currently trains and supervises associates in her group practice. Melissa is also an Internal Family Systems therapist. She is Level 3 trained and Certified and an IFSI-approved clinical consultant. She has served on staff as a PA for multiple Level 1 and Level 2 experiential IFS trainings through the IFS Institute. Melissa’s experience as the parent of a child with OCD led her to specialize in the treatment of individuals with anxiety and OCD as well as their families. She is a graduate of the IOCDF’s general, pediatric and advanced Behavior Therapy Training Institutes (BTTI) as well as the Supportive Parenting for Anxious Childhood Emotions (SPACE) program and Cognitive-behavioral Intervention for Tics training (CBIT). Her fifteen years of experience prior to that specialization provided a broad foundation of skills and approaches that infuse her integrative approach. With a background in family systems and mindfulness practices, she became driven to find more compassionate and accessible treatment for OCD. Melissa has developed an integrative approach that utilizes an IFS framework to provide evidence-based exposure therapy for OCD. She is an international speaker and educator on obsessive compulsive disorder and its treatment, and she is currently the president of the board of directors of OCD Southern California, an affiliate of the International OCD Foundation. In her role on the board of OCD SoCal advocates for individuals with OCD, hosts speakers’ series, trainings, and one of largest virtual OCD conferences worldwide. It is her mission to raise awareness, improve early identification and greater treatment accessibility for individuals with OCD and their families.

Resources for The Hidden Parts of OCD: ERP, IFS, and Self-Leadership with Melissa Mose (303)

Melissa’s website – Resources & information

IFS for OCD Clinician’s Guide – Melissa’s book – Internal Family Systems for OCD: A Clinician’s Guide  www.OCDSoCal.org – Melissa is president of OCD Southern California Beyond Attachment Styles course is available NOW!  

Learn how your nervous system, your mind, and your relationships work together in a fascinating dance, shaping who you are and how you connect with others. Online, Self-Paced, Asynchronous Learning with Quarterly Live Q&A’s! Earn 6 Continuing Education Credits – Available at Checkout As a listener of this podcast, use code BAS15 for a limited-time discount.

 

 

 

You are invited!  Join our exclusive community to get early access and discounts to things we produce, plus an ad-free, private feed. In addition, receive exclusive episodes recorded just for you. Sign up for our premium Neuronerd plan!! Click here!! 

 

Get your copy of Secure Relating here!! Please support our sponsors – they keep our podcast free and accessible to all! 

A coffee alternative with 4 adaptogenic mushrooms and ayurvedic herbs. With only a fraction of caffeine as a cup of coffee, you get energy without the anxiety, jitters, or crash of coffee

Go to mudwtr.com/tu to support the show and use code TU for 15% off

Patreon/Supercast Special Release – Bonus – Living Beyond the OCD Loop with Ally Kristan (302) This is a sneak peek of our episode with Ally Kristan, and part two of our three part series on OCD – available only on our Premium Supercast and Patreon platforms. For as little as $5/month you can have access to special releases like this one, first-to-know about upcoming events and discounts and an ad-free feed. Click here to join & finish the episode!! What is OCD really like beyond the stereotypes?

In part two of our three part series on deepening the understanding OCD, Marine biologist and author Ally Kristan shares her lifelong experience living with OCD, challenging common misconceptions that reduce the disorder to cleanliness or organization. Ally discusses the intrusive thoughts, compulsions, shame, and relentless search for certainty that characterize OCD, as well as the relief of finally receiving a diagnosis and effective support. Together, Ally and Dr. Ann Kelley explore themes of control, uncertainty, mindfulness, relationships, self-compassion, and how healing can come from understanding—not fighting—the parts of ourselves that struggle. The episode offers an honest, hopeful look at living with OCD and finding ways to transform fear into meaning and connection.

“We’re not out of touch with reality. We know that what we’re doing doesn’t make sense, but we just can’t help doing it anyway.” – Ally Kristan Time Stamps for Bonus – Living Beyond the OCD Loop with Ally Kristan (302)

06:34 Personal journey: Discovering my OCD
11:34 Therapeutic insights: The role of specialists
16:19 The OCD loop: Understanding the cycle
23:01 Transforming OCD: Finding positive outlets
31:03 Radical acceptance and its challenges
35:10 Finding Authenticity in Confrontation
42:23 Transforming compulsions into positive rituals
52:28 The balance of reassurance in relationships
55:59 The intersection of OCD and career choices
58:00 Lessons from penguins: Resilience and love
01:00:54 Conservation concerns: The krill catastrophe
01:07:28 Coping tools and resources for OCD

About our Guest – Ally Kristan 

Ally Kristan is a marine conservation biologist, Antarctic expert and OCD advocate originally from Raleigh, North Carolina. She holds a B.S. in Marine Biology from UNC Wilmington and an M.S. in Oceanography & Coastal Sciences from Louisiana State University. A salient voice for wildlife protection, Ally has appeared in National Public Radio (NPR), National Audubon Society and Hakai Magazine. Her work has brought her from a sea turtle hospital in North Carolina to whale watch boats in Maui to raucous seabird colonies in Florida, then from the U.S. National Science Foundation in Washington D.C. to McMurdo Station, Antarctica. Ally now resides on the North Carolina coast where, when not working in the lab, she can be found amongst animals.

 

Resources for Living Beyond the OCD Loop with Ally Kristan (302)

Ally Kristan’s website – Additional resources & information

Get your copy of her book, “Braving the Waves” here!!

Looking for our Upcoming Events? Click here!! Our Beyond Attachment Styles course is available NOW!

Learn how your nervous system, your mind, and your relationships work together in a fascinating dance, shaping who you are and how you connect with others.

Earn 6 Continuing Education Credits – Available at Checkout Online, Self-Paced, Asynchronous Learning with Quarterly Live Q&A’s

You can’t think your way out of OCD

In part one of our three-part series on Anxiety and OCD, Dr. Jon Abramowitz helps us understand why intrusive thoughts are normal, how OCD turns them into a source of distress, and what keeps the cycle going. We explore uncertainty, reassurance-seeking, relationship dynamics, and the research-backed treatments that help people reclaim their lives from OCD.In this conversation, we unpack the surprising truth about intrusive thoughts, why reassurance often backfires, and how learning to tolerate uncertainty can be a powerful path toward recovery.

“There is no such thing as absolute certainty.” – Dr. Jon Abramowitz Time Stamps for Why Certainty Isn’t the Answer: OCD, Intrusive Thoughts & Recovery with Dr. Jon Abramowitz (301)

02:40 Understanding anxiety and its disorders
05:46 Distinguishing normal anxiety from OCD
08:21 The nature of obsessional thoughts
14:09 The cycle of OCD and compulsions
16:53 The role of exposure and response prevention
19:44 Understanding scrupulosity in OCD
25:25 Treatment approaches for OCD
33:34 Managing distress in OCD therapy
36:55 Understanding control and uncertainty in OCD
40:41 Distinguishing OCD from Obsessive-Compulsive Personality Disorder
50:02 Supporting loved ones with OCD

About our Guest – Dr. Jon Abramowitz (301)

Jonathan (Jon) Abramowitz, Ph.D., is Professor and Director of Clinical Training in the Department of Psychology and Neuroscience at the University of North Carolina at Chapel Hill. His research and clinical work focuses on obsessive-compulsive disorder (OCD) and anxiety disorders, including fears and phobias, health anxiety, and panic attacks. He has authored over 350 scientific publications and 20 books, which have been translated into several languages. He served as President of the Association for Behavioral and Cognitive Therapies and as Editor or Associate Editor of several academic journals. Dr. Abramowitz has received wide recognition for his scholarly work and contributions.

 

Resources for Why Certainty Isn’t the Answer: OCD, Intrusive Thoughts & Recovery with Dr. Jon Abramowitz (301)

Dr. Abramowitz website – Resources and information

OCD resources for clinicians and consumers 

Beyond Attachment Styles course is available NOW!  

Learn how your nervous system, your mind, and your relationships work together in a fascinating dance, shaping who you are and how you connect with others. Online, Self-Paced, Asynchronous Learning with Quarterly Live Q&A’s! Earn 6 Continuing Education Credits – Available at Checkout As a listener of this podcast, use code BAS15 for a limited-time discount.

 

 

 

You are invited!  Join our exclusive community to get early access and discounts to things we produce, plus an ad-free, private feed. In addition, receive exclusive episodes recorded just for you. Sign up for our premium Neuronerd plan!! Click here!! 

 

Get your copy of Secure Relating here!!

Celebrating 300 episodes with one of the hardest relationship skills: feedback. Sue and Ann reflect on a decade of podcasting and dive into one of the the most challenging parts of any relationship: giving and receiving feedback. Through candid personal stories, humor, and clinical insight, they explore how attachment history, defensiveness, trauma, and vulnerability shape the way we handle conflict and communication. This conversation explains why feedback can feel so threatening, how couples get stuck arguing facts instead of feelings, and why repair—not perfection—is the foundation of healthy relationships. "Feedback is a bid for connection." - Sue Marriott, LCSW CGP Time Stamps for 300 Episodes In: Why Feedback Is So Hard (300) 01:56 The challenge of feedback: Giving and receiving 07:29 Understanding the difficulty of giving feedback 11:06 The fear of feedback: Avoidance and anticipation 16:15 The overestimation of awareness: Why we hold back 26:32 Navigating the receiving end of feedback 32:34 Impact over intent: The key to effective communication 34:54 Navigating feedback and racial sensitivity 41:08 Defensiveness in relationships 52:09 The role of trauma in relationships Please support our sponsors – they keep our podcast free and accessible to all!  A coffee alternative with 4 adaptogenic mushrooms and ayurvedic herbs. With only a fraction of caffeine as a cup of coffee, you get energy without the anxiety, jitters, or crash of coffee Go to mudwtr.com/tu to support the show and use code TU for 15% off   Beyond Attachment Styles course is available NOW!   Learn how your nervous system, your mind, and your relationships work together in a fascinating dance, shaping who you are and how you connect with others. Online, Self-Paced, Asynchronous Learning with Quarterly Live Q&A's! Earn 6 Continuing Education Credits – Available at Checkout As a listener of this podcast, use code BAS15 for a limited-time discount.     You are invited!  Join our exclusive community to get early access and discounts to things we produce, plus an ad-free, private feed. In addition, receive exclusive episodes recorded just for you. Sign up for our premium Neuronerd plan!! Click here!!    Get your copy of Secure Relating here!!

Sex can feel complicated when our parts get involved Patricia Rich introduces the concept of self-led sexuality — approaching sexuality from curiosity, compassion, and connection rather than fear or conditioning. She explains how understanding our internal “parts” can help individuals navigate conflicting desires, deepen consent, and create greater safety within themselves and their relationships. Explore the complexities of sexuality, emphasizing the importance of self-led sexuality and the integration of Internal Family Systems (IFS) in sexual therapy. The conversation also examines the broader cultural forces that influence sexuality, including capitalism, gender expectations, and the silence many therapists themselves experience around sexual topics. Grounded in both clinical insight and humanity, this episode offers a refreshing framework for understanding sexuality as a space for healing, embodiment, and authentic connection. "Listening to our desires doesn't mean we have to act on them all. Simply acknowledging the parts of ourselves who hold those desires and validating their longings can bring inner connection and vitality." - Patricia Rich, LCSW CST-S Time Stamps for Bonus - Self-Led Sexuality: Reclaiming Intimacy Through IFS with Patricia Rich, LCSW CST-S (299) 01:51 The challenges of discussing sexuality 07:53 Integrating IFS into sexual therapy 13:39 The positive intentions of our parts 22:17 Self-led sexuality: Leading from within 28:01 Therapists' relationship with sexuality 35:51 The six S's of sexual self-energy 40:28 Creating Safety in Sexual Conversations 45:03 Exploring sensuality and its barriers 01:01:10 Exploring exiled parts and performance pressure 01:05:07 The concept of internal consent 01:11:36 Cultural influences on sexuality and self-perception About our Guest - Patricia Rich, LCSW, CST-S (She/Her) Patricia Rich, LCSW, CST-S (she/her) is an IFS Institute Certified Level 3 IFS Therapist and Approved Consultant and an AASECT Certified Sex Therapist and Supervisor. She has developed a unique integrative model for Self-Led Sexuality to help people findmore ease, joy, and confidence in the bedroom and beyond. She has originated IFS- informed concepts such as Internal Consent and The Six S’s of Sexual Self-Energy. Patty has presented at the IFS Annual Conference, taught a module for the IFS Institute Online Continuity program, led workshops internationally, and authored a chapter in Altogether Us: Integrating the IFS Model with Key Modalities, Communities and Trends. She offers training and consultation to professionals and loves helping people to BeHold and Lead their Internal Sexual Systems (BLISS)TM. She hosts “Self-Led in Bed: An IFS & Sexuality Podcast” and lives in the Philadelphia area where she also has a private practice. You can get her free guide to The Six S’s and learn more about her offerings at www.patriciarich.com or follow her on Instagram @patriciarichconsulting. Resources for Bonus - Self-Led Sexuality: Reclaiming Intimacy Through IFS with Patricia Rich, LCSW CST-S (299) Self-Led in Bed: An IFS & Sexuality Podcast - Patricia's podcast Patricia's website - Information & resources IFS Integration: A Comprehensive Guide to Applying Internal Family Systems Across Modalities, Populations, and Clinical Presentations - Check out Patricia's chapter in this book Beyond Attachment Styles course is available NOW!   Learn how your nervous system, your mind, and your relationships work together in a fascinating dance, shaping who you are and how you connect with others. Online, Self-Paced, Asynchronous Learning with Quarterly Live Q&A's! Earn 6 Continuing Education Credits – Available at Checkout As a listener of this podcast, use code BAS15 for a limited-time discount.    

What does it mean to belong to more than one world at once? Sahaj Kohli—founder of Brown Girl Therapy and author of What Will People Say?—explores the emotional complexity of bicultural identity, the immigrant experience, and the hidden pressures of being “culturally enough.” Together, we explore how culture shapes mental health, why many therapy models miss the mark for marginalized communities, and what truly culturally responsive care can look like. Sahaj also shares how social media became a lifeline for connection, community, and healing for people navigating multiple identities. This episode offers powerful insight for therapists, helpers, and anyone balancing family expectations, identity, and belonging across cultures. "Collectives are made of individuals, and we can't be our best selves within those collectives and in those roles if we are not also taking care of ourselves. Yet we can't be our best selves as individuals without considering the collective and our communities.” - Sahaj Kohli Time Stamps for Between Two Worlds: Navigating Bicultural Identity with Sahaj Kohli (298) 03:46 Cultural identity and the immigrant experience 07:28 The birth of Brown Girl Therapy 11:22 Understanding the dominant narrative 15:07 Cultural differences in communication and boundaries 19:05 Cultural responsiveness in therapy 26:49 The burden of cultural "enoughness" 29:11 Navigating pride and shame in biculturalism 31:08 Grief and loss in cultural transition 39:20 Resources for bicultural and multicultural understanding About our Guest - Sahaj Kohli MA.Ed, LGPC, NCC  Sahaj Kohli by Beowulf Sheehan Sahaj Kaur Kohli MA.Ed, LGPC, NCC is an award-winning therapist and mental health educator. She is the founder of Brown Girl Therapy (@browngirltherapy), the first and largest mental health and wellness community organization for adult children of immigrants, an advice columnist for the Washington Post, and host and creator of the limited series podcast, So We’ve Been Told. Sahaj is also author of the book, "But What Will People Say: Navigating Mental Health, Identity, Love and Family Between Cultures" named one of Audible’s “best of” in 2024. With a 6+ year career in journalism under her belt, Sahaj's passion lies at the intersection of narrative storytelling and mental health advocacy. You can follow Sahaj’s writing on Substack: Culturally Enough. is a resource for the community and The Bicultural Brief is a resource for clinicians who want to be more culturally responsive in their care. Sahaj’s words and work have been featured across media, like in Today, NPR, Good Morning America, CNN, The New York Times, and others. Sahaj also serves as a corporate consultant, educator and international speaker. Resources for Between Two Worlds: Navigating Bicultural Identity with Sahaj Kohli (298) @BrownGirlTherapy - Sahaj's Instagram profile Sahaj's Website - Resources, information, events & more But What Will People Say? Navigating Mental Health, Identity, Love, and Family Between Cultures - Get your copy today!! Beyond Attachment Styles course is available NOW!   Learn how your nervous system, your mind, and your relationships work together in a fascinating dance, shaping who you are and how you connect with others. Online, Self-Paced, Asynchronous Learning with Quarterly Live Q&A's! Earn 6 Continuing Education Credits – Available at Checkout As a listener of this podcast, use code BAS15 for a limited-time discount.       You are invited!  Join our exclusive community to get early access and discounts to things we produce, plus an ad-free, private feed. In addition, receive exclusive episodes recorded just for you. Sign up for our premium Neuronerd plan!! Click here!!  Get your copy of Secure Relating here!!

Therapist and author Oona Metz draws on three decades of experience supporting women through divorce. She breaks down the emotional arc of separation through her five-phase model, offering a clear lens into the grief, upheaval, and eventual growth that can unfold. The episode also explores common misconceptions, practical guidance for clinicians and individuals, and the powerful role of support groups in the healing process. Listen now at TherapistUncensored.com/TU297

Explore the role of equanimity, mindfulness, and compassion in navigating an increasingly complex world. Special guest Margaret Cullen alongside co-host Sue Marriott discuss the evolution of mindfulness in modern culture, the foundations of compassion-based practices, and how these approaches can support resilience and emotional balance. Grounded in both clinical insight and lived practice, this conversation offers a thoughtful, accessible perspective on cultivating steadiness and clarity in the midst of ongoing challenges. Listen to the full episode now at TherapistUncensored.com/TU296

Prentis Hemphill, alongside co-host Sue Marriott, traces their path from social organizing to somatic therapy, revealing how personal healing and collective transformation are deeply intertwined. Together, they explore how inherited myths, power dynamics, and collective trauma shape both our inner worlds and our social systems. This episode invites therapists and change makers alike to consider healing as more than an individual process—it’s relational, embodied, and political in impact. Prentice offers grounded reflections and practical tools for working with the body, navigating power, and engaging in healing that extends beyond the self. Listen to the full episode now at TherapistUncensored.com/TU295

Dr. Christine Vaccaro helps demystify women’s sexual health - exploring everything from hormones and anatomy to libido and pelvic floor challenges. Together, we break down what’s often misunderstood or overlooked, offering clear, empowering insights to help women better understand their bodies and advocate for their care. Listen now at TherapistUncensored.com/TU294

Ann Koplow shares her journey as a therapist and musician, discussing the healing power of music, her experiences with a rare heart condition, and the importance of authenticity in therapy. She emphasizes the role of shamelessness in creative expression and how songwriting serves as a therapeutic tool for both herself and her clients. The conversation explores the impact of music on mental health, the creation of community through shared experiences, and the necessity of letting go of shame to embrace one's true self. Listen now at TherapistUncensored.com/TU293

Co-host Sue Marriott and guest Lisa Firestone examine how attachment wounds, emotional dysregulation, and relational disconnection can quietly escalate into crisis. Together they explore the often-overlooked link between attachment patterns and suicidality, and why understanding your relational blueprint may be one of the most important protective factors you have. Blending research, clinical experience, and practical strategies, this episode offers tools for building emotional resilience, increasing self-awareness, and supporting others through vulnerable moments. Listen to the full episode now at TherapistUncensored.com/TU292

Evolutionary biologist Dr. Justin Garcia joins co-host Sue Marriott to deepen our understanding of the myths and realities of modern relationships. From monogamy to consensual non-monogamy, we explore how jealousy and trust function - not as flaws - but as deeply human signals shaped by biology and attachment. Dr. Garcia breaks down how relationships shift over time, especially as we age, and why sexual satisfaction isn’t just about frequency - it’s about novelty, meaning, and connection. We dive into the neuroscience of intimacy, including the roles of dopamine and oxytocin, and revisit the Kinsey scale to better understand the fluidity of sexual orientation. This conversation is a grounded, nuanced look at how passion evolves, and how couples can intentionally cultivate desire, curiosity, and emotional safety over the long haul. Check it out at TherapistUncensored.com/TU291

Dr. Aly Cohen and co-host Dr. Ann Kelley discuss the often-overlooked importance of drinking water quality, the impact of environmental toxins on health, and the connection between gut health and mental well-being. Dr. Cohen highlights the alarming rise of autoimmune diseases and the role of hormones and chemicals in our health. Learn practical, manageable ways to reduce toxin exposure, while exploring how nutrition, lifestyle choices, education, and community support play a vital role in empowering people to take control of their health.

In this special 10-year anniversary episode, Sue and Ann reflect on a decade of Therapist Uncensored - how it began, how it’s changed, and how the relationships formed have deepened along the way. They share candidly about the influence from our listeners in keeping them curious, accountable, and grounded, as well as the ways their own thinking has evolved through conversations with leading experts and thoughtful audience feedback. Together they explore the joys and tensions of teaching in the mental health space, including the importance of humility, questioning long-held assumptions, and recognizing the limits of any single perspective. This episode is both a celebration and a recommitment - to inclusivity, to amplifying diverse voices, and to ongoing learning in a field that is constantly evolving. And above all, it’s a heartfelt thank-you to the community that has made the last ten years possible. View the full show notes at TherapistUncensored.com/TU289

Conflict in relationships is inevitable - find out the ins and outs of repair for healthy relationships. We are back with relationship expert, Dr. Stan Tatkin to explore the inner workings of relationships from a biological and societal perspective, and his new book, In Each Other's Care. All humans are complicated creatures and if we spend enough time with each other, it's going to get tense.  That part is OK, but what happens after arguing disconnection or tension is what really matters.

A replay episode from our powerful interview with Lisa Kays on how improv can deepen conversations around tough topics like race and oppression. Click Here to View the Original Episode Shownotes Improv in Therapy and in Life – Explore the power – and sheer fun – of using improvisation in therapy! Dr. Ann Kelley and Lisa Kays discuss how improv can deepen conversations around tough topics like race and oppression. They examine white supremacy culture and show how improv values like collaboration, slowing down, and embracing complexity can challenge these norms. Improv fosters creativity, playfulness, and self-reflection to help reduce defensiveness and strengthen relationships in everyday life, at work, or in our closest relationships. By creating a supportive, collaborative environment, improv deepens connections and helps people tap into a wider range of emotions. “A culture of improvisation is collaborative – it is nature – you cannot do it by yourself.” – Lisa Kays Time Stamps for Improv in Therapy & Life 03:30 The integration of improv and tough conversations 10:03 The origins of improv and its connection to social justice 14:27 Contrasting white supremacy culture and improv culture 19:20 Questioning cultural norms and valuing relationships 25:29 The power of the ‘And' in joining and connecting 38:27 The power of improv in building secure relationships 53:25 Embracing creativity and letting go of perfectionism 58:12 Creating a culture of support and collaboration 01:05:04 Applying improv in everyday life 01:09:10 Deepening connections and accessing different emotions About our Guest for Improv Therapy – Lisa Kays LICSW, LCSW, LCSW-C Lisa Kays, LICSW, LCSW-C, LCSW, is an independently licensed clinical social worker in Washington, D.C, Maryland, Virginia, Oregon and New Jersey. She obtained her MSW from Catholic University in 2011 and has worked in a variety of clinical settings. Since 2013, she has been in private practice, providing individual, couples and group therapy to adults. She has interest in social work ethic and has published on and leads ethics training on the intersection of technology, social media and social work ethics as well as anti-racism and systemic oppression. Her practice also provides opportunities for other presenters to develop CE trainings on under-taught topics linked to social justice, systemic racism, and oppression. In addition to her traditional psychotherapy work, Lisa was a performing improviser from 2007-2019 and was on the faculty of Washington Improv Theatre from 2008-2016. She developed Washington Improv Theater's first Improv for Therapist's class and has offered Improv for Therapists courses, workshops and trainings to individual clinicians, pastors, life coaches, and psychiatrists, as well as clinical agencies. Since its inception, Lisa has trained more than 500 people in the application of improvisation to foster personal growth and stronger and more cohesive groups. Lisa has been invited to lead trainings in improv-informed therapy at the American Academy of Psychotherapists, the Mid-Atlantic Group Psychotherapy Association, the American Group Psychotherapy Association, and at The Psychotherapy Networker, among others. Her work has been featured in The Washington Post and on NBC4. Recently, Lisa launched a humor, humility-infused podcast, “What if Nothing's Wrong With You?” with co-host Paula D. Atkinson on themes related to therapy, mental health, oppression, patriarchy and how it's all interconnected. Resources for Improv Therapy –  Lisa Kay's – Website & Resources The Fierce Urgency of Now: Improvisation, Rights, and the Ethics of Cocreation (Improvisation, Community, and Social Practice) – by Fischlin, Daniel; Heble, Ajah; Lipsitz, George Theater Games – Viola Spolin Resources Rehearsals for Growth – Website and Educational Resources Decolonizing Therapy: Oppression, Historical Trauma, and Politicizing Your Practice – book by Jennifer Mullan, PsyD The Artist's Way by Julia Cameron – Book and Resources Free Play: Improvisation in Life and Art – Nachmanovitch, Stephen Beyond Attachment Styles course is available NOW!   Learn how your nervous system, your mind, and your relationships work together in a fascinating dance, shaping who you are and how you connect with others. Online, Self-Paced, Asynchronous Learning with Quarterly Live Q&A's – Next one is January 23rd! Earn 6 Continuing Education Credits – Available at Checkout As a listener of this podcast, use code BAS15 for a limited-time discount. Get your copy of Secure Relating here!! You are invited!  Join our exclusive community to get early access and discounts to things we produce, plus an ad-free, private feed. In addition, receive exclusive episodes recorded just for you. Sign up for our premium Neuronerd plan!! Click here!!

Replay from our 2024 episode - this is a special conversation between co-host Sue Marriott and special guest Jeff Lutes. Both members of the LGBTQ+ community, this discussion dives into raising families, the evolution of the community, allyship, gender, and the importance of advocacy. While there has been some progress, the LGBTQ+ community still actively faces discrimination. Whether you're a practicing therapist with clients in the community or have LGBTQ-identifying loved ones, this episode is for you. Through a personal and professional lens, this conversation offers new perspectives and shines a light on the significance of staying educated and being an active voice.

Join co-host Sue Marriott and Dr. Shena Young as they dive into liberation psychology and the conflict between intuition and the traditional European model of psychology. Dr. Shena highlights embodying a holistic approach to help heal traumas and deeply root us in our most authentic selves. Whether through connections with nature or the exploration of ancestral traditions, this discussion is enriched with various opportunities to reconnect and liberate our mind, body, heart, and spirit.

Dr. Ann Kelley is joined LIVE from Psychotherapy Networker with Dafna Lender, to explore the complex dynamics of parent-child estrangement. Focusing on the emotional and psychological impacts of cutting off family relationships, together they highlight the cultural influences that contribute to these estrangements, the therapeutic perspectives on navigating such situations, and the importance of empathy and boundaries in managing family dynamics. This conversation is about learning to hold both empathy and boundaries - understanding why someone might step away, and how to stay grounded and compassionate in the process. It’s an honest look at the heartbreak, the healing, and the hope that can emerge when families face difficult truths. View the full episode shownotes at TherapistUncensored.com/TU284

Join Sue Marriott and Dr. Sean Inderbitzen - an autistic psychotherapist and advocate for neurodiversity - as he shares his powerful personal and professional journey in understanding autism. Together, they explore the evolution of autism diagnosis, the intersections between attachment and neurodivergence, and how polyvagal theory can both illuminate and complicate the autistic experience. Dr. Inderbitzen offers insights on self-diagnosis, identity formation, and what truly person-centered therapy looks like for autistic individuals. This conversation highlights the central role of trust, safety, and authentic connection in helping neurodivergent clients thrive. View the full episode shownotes at TherapistUncensored.com/TU283

José Rosario shares the transformative role of storytelling in healing and liberation. He invites therapists to move beyond traditional coping frameworks and embrace radical healing - an approach that centers cultural wisdom, intersectional identity, and community empowerment. Together, Sue and José discuss how clinicians can respond to hate-based violence, recognize collective trauma, and actively dismantle systems of harm. José also shares his personal journey toward self-acceptance and the playful practices that sustain his work, offering inspiration for those seeking to uplift marginalized voices through creativity and connection. Listen to the full episode now at TherapistUncensored.com/TU282

Dr. Ann Kelley sits down with Dr. Bill Doherty to explore the idea of “Citizen Therapists” and how therapists — and all of us — can help bridge divides in a polarized world. Together, they dive into discernment counseling for couples on the brink of divorce, the groundbreaking work of Braver Angels in fostering dialogue across political differences, and the skills we all need for hard but healing conversations. This conversation highlights the power of curiosity, respectful boundaries, and understanding - whether in our closest relationships or across society. View the full shownotes at TherapistUncensored.com/TU

Ann Kelley and Diana Hill dive into the concept of wise effort and its impact on how we manage our energy in both personal and professional life. They explore the difference between life force energy and anxiety, the role of emotional sensitivity, and why community resilience matters. Diana shares insights on how to wisely channel your “genius energy,” break free from stuck patterns, and cultivate compassionate connections that support growth and balance. Listen to the full episode at TherapistUncensored.com/TU280

Benjamin Fry, a mental health professional and founder of Khiron Clinics joins Sue Marriott as he shares his personal journey through trauma, and how his experiences shaped his personal and professional approach to therapy. From the establishment of his clinic, to innovative treatment modalities like EMDR and somatic experiencing - which further led to the introduction of the PhysioCam, a tool designed to help clients visualize their nervous system states. With the ever evolving world of technology and mental health, together they emphasize the importance of psychoeducation and accessibility in mental health care, aiming to provide hope and resources for those in need. View the full episode show notes at TherapistUncensored.com/TU279

In this half of the conversation, Rebecca Kase and the Sue dig deeper into the concept of interoception, emphasizing its significance in therapy and personal well-being. They discuss how our physiological states influence our narratives and the importance of breath in regulating these states. From the roles of implicit and explicit memory in shaping our experiences to how adaptive and maladaptive memories affect our mental health, they highlight therapeutic approaches to updating narratives and the journey of healing and resilience, providing practical tools for therapists and resources for further learning. View this episodes' shownotes at TherapistUncensored.com/TU278

Dr. Ann Kelley and expert Judith Matz unpack the complex relationship between dieting, emotional eating, body image, and weight stigma. Together they challenge conventional views on weight and health, emphasizing that fitness matters more than the number on the scale, and explores why most diets fail both psychologically and physiologically. They also cover the historical roots of fatphobia, the dangers of weight bias in healthcare, and the rise of weight loss drugs like Ozempic. Judith highlights the importance of attuned eating, informed consent, and compassionate care, offering a weight-inclusive approach to healing our relationship with food and body. View the full episode show notes at TherapistUncensored.com/TU277

If you’re tired of cancel culture but still care about justice - this conversation is for you In 2022, we had the privilege of having Loretta J. Ross on the podcast to discuss "Calling in the Call Out Culture". With the publication of her new book, "Calling In: How to Start Making Change with Those You'd Rather Cancel" - we felt this message was just as relevant as ever. Together, Sue Marriott and Loretta J. Ross explore the themes of social justice, empathy, and the importance of dialogue in navigating political divides. Loretta shares insights from her book, discussing the need for compassion and under standing in activism. They delve into the complexities of human relationships, the balance between calling in and calling out, and the significance of individual experiences in shaping political views. The conversation emphasizes the power of community engagement and the role of personal growth in fostering a more just society. View this episodes shownotes at TherapistUncensored.com/TU276 and join our premium online community for bonus content at TherapistUncensored.com/Join

Use the VCR Method to navigate difficult conversations without retreating or conflicting.  In this powerful conversation, one of the most influential voices on racial justice and family therapy, Dr. Kenneth Hardy talks with Dr. Ann Kelley about the VCR Method (Validate, Challenge, Request) for navigating difficult conversations without retreating into silence or conflict. Hardy reveals how White-bodied folks and People of Color/Culture (POC) can move beyond either/or thinking by recognizing their multiple selves - the parts that hold privilege and the parts that experience subjugation - no matter who you are.  Key insights include Hardy's concept of "invisible wounds" - the unnamed racial trauma that affects people of color daily - and why the expectation for Black people to "take the high road" actually perpetuates harm. Through a real example from a heated workshop exchange with a white student, Hardy demonstrates the VCR approach in action, showing how validation, strategic challenge, and clear requests can keep us connected through rupture rather than defaulting to our most activated, subjugated responses. This episode offers practical tools for therapists and anyone seeking more authentic, healing-centered conversations about difference in general and particularly, race and privilege. Hardy's framework challenges us to develop both a racial lens and a clear sense of our racial selves, moving from fragility toward the courage to stay in relationship even when conversations get difficult. Dr. Kenneth V. Hardy shares his personal journey and deep professional insights on race, trauma, and cultivating racial sensitivity in therapy. He explores the “invisible wounds” carried by people of color, urging therapists to critically examine their own privilege and biases. Dr. Hardy introduces his VCR mode - a practical framework for navigating difficult conversations about race - and underscores the vital role of hope in sustaining diversity, equity, and inclusion (DEI) efforts. View the full episode shownotes at TherapistUncensored.com/TU275

concept of interoception—can support healing from trauma. Rebecca shares her personal story as a survivor and highlights the importance of creating safety, tuning into the body’s internal signals, and approaching somatic work with compassion. Together, they unpack how interoception differs from general perception, why it matters in therapy, and how small, gradual steps can help rebuild connection with the body. View full shownotes at TherapistUncensored.com/TU274.

Dr. Ann Kelley is joined by Dr. Jill Stoddard as they unpack the complexities of imposter syndrome—why it shows up, who it impacts most, and how to move through it. Drawing on her expertise in psychological flexibility and values-based living, Dr. Stoddard shares strategies to navigate self-doubt, marginalization, and internalized insecurity. Learn how to reframe discomfort, build a healthier relationship with vulnerability, and use these moments as powerful opportunities for connection and growth. Join our exclusive online community at TherapistUncensored.com/Join

Dr. Dixon Chibanda shares the powerful story behind the Friendship Bench, a community-based mental health model that centers healing in the heart of local communities. He explores how grandmothers—often overlooked in traditional mental health systems—play a vital role in offering care, connection, and wisdom. Dr. Chibanda discusses the barriers to accessing mental health services, the role of storytelling in the healing process, and the global expansion of the Friendship Bench. Grounded in research and lived experience, this conversation invites a rethinking of care—away from over-medicalization and toward more accessible, human-centered approaches.

Dr. Monnica Williams teaches Sue Marriott as they explore the deep psychological toll of racism, focusing on the concept of racial trauma and its cumulative impact on people of color. She highlights the importance of recognizing these experiences within therapeutic settings and the need for diversity in mental health research and practice. The discussion delves into the role of civil courage and meaningful allyship—particularly among white individuals in addressing systemic injustice. Dr. Williams offers insights into the multifaceted nature of activism, the harm caused by microaggressions, and the emotional labor involved in navigating everyday racism. From the fear of law enforcement to the unique challenges faced by white women in activism, Dr. Williams urges practitioners and allies alike to listen deeply, receive feedback openly, and use their privilege to support marginalized communities.

Let's get real about revitalizing the therapy landscape Ann Kelley and Sue Marriott are back for a one on one episode, and sharing their personal reflections on mental health, community, and the evolving challenges clinicians face today. From the tension between accessibility and sustainability in therapy, to the influence of corporate models - they discuss the need for creativity in the field. Emphasizing connection, curiosity, and professional growth, they introduce exciting opportunities, updates, and even a new series focused on inclusivity - inviting listeners to find and amplify their unique voice in the mental health space.

Dr. Ann Kelley is joined by Dr. Jean Twenge to discuss her groundbreaking research on generational differences with a focus on how technology—especially smartphones and social media—has transformed communication, relationships, and mental health. They explore how historical shifts and longer life spans contribute to delayed life milestones and what she calls the "slow life strategy." Dr. Twenge highlights the alarming rise in anxiety and depression among Generation Z, which is closely linked to increased screen time and reduced face-to-face interactions. Together they discuss practical steps parents can take to support healthier development and social connection. Shownotes www.therapistuncensored.com/tu269. Join our Neuronerd online community www.therapistuncensored.com/join.

Dr. Aditi Sethi, the founder of the Center for Conscious Living and Dying, shares her profound journey into the realm of death and dying. She discusses the importance of presence, the healing power of music, and challenges faced in community-based end-of-life care. Alongside Sue Marriott, they explore the profound themes surrounding death and dying, emphasizing the importance of embracing death to enhance life. From concepts like ecstatic dying to the role of psychedelics in alleviating fear of death, Aditi shares insights from her experiences as a death doula.

Alongside co-host Sue Marriott, Dr. Dan Siegel explores how loss, vulnerability, and connection shape personal growth and healing. He discusses the science of attachment and personality, highlighting nine adaptive patterns that emerge from non-secure attachment. The conversation also explores how neuroscience sheds light on emotional needs, alongside Siegel’s personal reflections on his own attachment history and path as a professional. Together they unpack how neuroscience, motivation, and community impact therapy. The episode offers practical insights for clinicians, emphasizing a compassionate, non-shaming approach to mental health and the journey toward secure attachment and the feeling of wholeness.

Dr. Vanessa Scaringi and Kathryn Garland talk about the complexities of disordered eating and body image, especially in light of cultural pressures and the effects of the COVID-19 pandemic. They explore the differences between disordered eating and eating disorders, and also discuss how medications like GLP-1 affect eating habits. The conversation touches on how society promotes unhealthy body standards and behaviors, and how our emotional relationship with food is often overlooked. Highlighting the role of attachment styles in shaping eating patterns, they stress the importance of intuitive eating—especially when parenting. Follow along as they offer practical tips for developing a healthier relationship with food and explore therapeutic methods that support recovery.

Sue Marriott is joined by Quentin Arispe, as they share their incredible journey of self-discovery. Exploring themes of gender fluidity, the impact of theater on personal growth, and the balance between masculinity and femininity - they discuss the role of grief in creative expression. Their conversation highlights the importance of authenticity and vulnerability in the creative process, as well as the transformative journey of humanizing the queer experience through art.

Patreon/Supercast Special Release - You can listen to the full version now at TherapistUncensored.com/Join This is a sneak peek of our episode with Wendy Behary - available only on our Premium Supercast and Patreon platforms. For as little as $5/month you can have access to special releases like this one, first-to-know about upcoming events and discounts and an ad-free feed. Dr. Ann Kelley and narcissism expert, Wendy Behary, explore the complexities of narcissistic behavior, its development, and the challenges faced by those experiencing relationships with narcissists. Follow along as they dive into the myths, the spectrum of narcissistic traits, and the importance of understanding the underlying insecurities that drive behavior. Behary touches on the cultural implications and how it manifests in society today, as well as practical strategies for individuals to navigate relationships, highlighting the significance of maintaining one's own mental health and well-being.

In this conversation, Dr. Ann Kelley and Occupational Therapist Kim Barthel explore the conscious evolution of the human spirit, the importance of self-compassion, and the integration of neuroception with therapeutic practices. Through Barthel's book, 'Conversations with a Rattlesnake,' they dive into the significance of sensory integration and attachment in personal development. Using Porges' "Safe and Sound Protocol", they touch on how understanding one's own nervous system and the cues of safety can lead to better emotional regulation and connection with not only oneself, but others. Follow along as they discuss the themes of trauma, healing and the science of connection.

Ann and Sue share a special conversation with Dr. Stephen Porges where they explore how modern attachment meets Polyvagal theory. From the evolution of attachment theory to understanding bodily states and how they influence our interactions, they dive into the intricate relationships between emotional expression, brain function, and therapeutic techniques. Together they explore the Safe and Sound Protocol and its role in promoting engagement as well as insights into the application of these techniques both professionally and personally.

Dr. Ann Kelley and Dr. Alexandra Solomon discuss her book 'Taking Sexy Back,' exploring the intersection of gender and sexuality, the impact of societal messages on women's sexual experiences, and the importance of self-advocacy in relationships. They dive into the complexities of desire, body image, and the influence of patriarchy on both men and women - emphasizing the need for emotional awareness and connection in intimate relationships. Explore the evolving landscape of sexuality across generations and the impact of online dating and pornography on sexual experiences.